Masculine Confidence Framework

Tag: relationships

  • Why Are Some Men So Good With Women?

    Why Are Some Men So Good With Women?

    Seduction. Desire. Play.

    Let’s be real—we love to be swept off our feet by a lover.

    There’s nothing like a woman so stunning she stops you in your tracks.

    And sure, we all know true beauty is on the inside, but let’s not pretend we don’t appreciate it when it’s on the outside too.

    Here’s the thing—feminine women feel the same pull.

    Only for them, it’s not about looks.

    They notice:

    ? Strength

    ? Self-confidence

    ? Momentum/Leadership

    That’s what draws her in.

    That’s what keeps her interested.

    And if your Relationship is struggling, it’s time to take a good hard look in the mirror.

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    The Hard Truth About Attraction in a Strained Relationship

    It’s easy to let yourself go once you’re married.

    You settle into routines.

    You get comfortable.

    You assume she’ll always be there.

    And then one day… she isn’t.

    Now, let’s be clear—getting a fresh haircut or dropping 20 pounds won’t save your marriage.

    But let’s use some common sense—if you care about your house, you paint it and fix the roof when it leaks.

    Your body, your presence, your energy? Same thing.

    Neglect yourself, and you send a message—you’re not serious about LIVING.

    And if you’re not serious about living, why should she be excited to live it with you?

    This is where most men go wrong.

    They wonder, Why are some men so good with women?—and assume it’s about tricks, gimmicks, or even luck.

    But the truth is much simpler.

    It’s about presence.

    It’s about energy.

    It’s about being a man who lives with purpose rather than looking to others to give him those things.

    The Inside & Outside Game of Seduction

    In the pickup world, they call haircuts, jawlines, and money “Outside Game.”

    It’s what turns heads.

    It can attract women fast, but like a beautiful storefront with nothing inside, if there’s no substance, she’ll walk right out the back door.

    That’s where Inside Game comes in.

    Inside Game is about who you are when it counts:

    ? How you hold yourself when things get tense

    ? Your tone when she pushes back

    ? The way you look at her when she’s in her own storm

    That’s when she feels who you really are.

    And if what she feels isn’t grounded, strong, and certain—she pulls away.

    It’s why some men seem to have natural success with women while others struggle.

    They embody strength and certainty—not to seduce, but as a way of being true to themselves.

    Your Wife Wants to Be Seduced—Even Now

    Yes, even now.

    She wants to be romanced.

    She wants to be wooed.

    She wants to feel something real.

    Because let’s be honest—the daily grind? It’s the exact opposite of seduction.

    Even one of the best pickup artists of all time, stage-named “Mystery,” said married women were his easiest targets.

    Why?

    Because they were starving for attention, excitement, and connection.

    Can you blame them?

    We’re all racing toward the grave.

    How many truly great memories are you going to make before you get there?

    Women seem to be most aware of this.

    She won’t waste her time on a sinking ship.

    And if you’re wondering, Why are some men so good with women?, here’s your answer: They live their PURPOSE from the INSIDE-OUT.

    How You Can Become A Purpose Filled Man

    I know a man is living from the OUTSIDE-In when he:

    ? Complains

    ? Blames others

    ? Seeks validation


    Here’s the truth—when your purpose and mission are clear, you should walk, talk, and behave like a man who loves every damn minute of it.


    And that’s all any woman truly dreams of feeling from her man.


    If you’re ready to do what it takes to bring that energy back—Then let’s talk.


    Book a “Get Grounded Now“ consultation, and I’ll get you clear on your next move.

    Stay grounded, brother.

    —Garrett Prettyman

  • Being a Man Who Defies the Odds

    Being a Man Who Defies the Odds

    I get goosebumps and feel instant respect for a man who defies all odds and creates what he wants.

    A man who doesn’t play small.

    A man who looks at the odds stacked against him and moves forward anyway.

    I wasn’t born into wealth.

    No silver spoon.

    No handouts.

    Everything I have—I built with my own two hands.

    At 12 years old, I spent an entire summer busting my ass doing yard work for neighbors until I made my first $100.

    Then I reinvested it—bought better tools, worked faster, and made more.

    By my late 20s, I’d rolled several million through my company.

    And I did it despite the odds:

    ? A recession

    ? Living in a town where most people made $20K a year

    ? My wife’s affair and a brutal divorce

    ? Heavy state taxes and red tape

    ? People criticizing my success, calling me an “evil business owner”

    You know what? Didn’t even matter.

    Because I was too busy doing the work.

    I wasn’t sitting around worrying about whether it was supposed to be possible—I was too busy making it happen.

    2008? One of my best years.

    I didn’t even realize there was a recession until people told me.

    COVID? Another great year.

    While the world locked itself inside, my crews and I were out doing clean-ups for wildfire prevention—even when the state threatened to arrest us.

    A Man Who Defies The Odds Takes Action NOW

    Fear makes you second-guess yourself.

    It convinces you to hesitate when you should be moving.

    But here’s the truth: The right time to act is always NOW.

    I want to introduce you to a client of mine—let’s call him Chuck.

    Chuck is a go-big or-go-home kind of guy.

    Hard worker.

    No excuses.

    He thought he had masculinity figured out.

    He had the truck.

    The military background.

    The paycheck.

    But at home? Different story.

    Over the years, an emotional gap grew between him and his wife.

    Like a lot of us, he was successful everywhere—except in his marriage.

    She started pulling away.

    He figured as long as they still had sex, things were fine.

    She didn’t see it that way.

    Because to a woman, a relationship isn’t worth it unless there’s emotional safety, a heart-to-heart connection, and a man who knows his value—independent of her moods.

    Right before Christmas, she filed for divorce.

    Chuck was wrecked.

    But even through the pain, he made a decision: He was gonna do the work—not just to save his marriage, but to become the man he was always meant to be in his relationships.

    The Light Switch Flipped

    A few sessions in, something clicked.

    I asked him what changed.

    He said:

    “I realized I can accept that my wife no longer loves me… or I can keep wishing it was different and keep suffering.”

    Boom.

    That was it.

    Clarity.

    Clarity about what he’s worth. Clarity about his standards. Clarity about who he gives his value to.

    And once that switch flipped?

    Everything changed.

    Suddenly, he had the power to create an emotional connection with anyone, anytime.

    Now? Women blush when he talks to them—not because he’s running some kind of game, but because they feel seen in a way most men never learn.

    And get this—Chuck lost everything in a matter of weeks. His home, his wife, his dogs, his future plans.

    If that wasn’t enough reason to give up, wildfires hit California.

    Instead of throwing in the towel, he got to work fighting fires with his crew while still pressing forward in his personal development with me.

    What Are You Waiting For?

    Chuck is a man who defies the odds.

    He’s putting in the work while pulling long shifts, rebuilding his life, and starting over from scratch.

    I asked him what he’d tell another man who’s waiting for the right time to act.

    He said: “Life is short, and hard sometimes. So make the decision to be the man you want to be. Be the hero of your own story. Get educated, do the work, and change your life faster than trying to figure it out alone.”

    That, my friend, is the mindset of a man who refuses to be a victim.

    Chuck owns his power now.

    He told me: “The power to be sad or happy is mine, and no one else’s. Anxiety tells you you’re unprepared for what’s happening. The books, the coaching, the work—it gave me the tools to be ready.”

    Phew! That gives me tears.

    Those are the words of a champion.

    He’s walking, head high, through his right of passage to join the ranks of great men.

    A man who defies the odds and takes action is the kind of man I love working with.

    Are you that kind of man?

    If so, we should talk.

    Book a free Get Grounded Now call, and let’s get clear on your next move.

    Stay grounded, brother.

    —Garrett Prettyman

  • Failing Marriage? 2 Mistakes Successful Men in Their 40s Make

    Failing Marriage? 2 Mistakes Successful Men in Their 40s Make

    Are you a man who is highly successful everywhere in life yet finds yourself in a failing marriage? I will show you a clear path to achieving the same success in your marriage that you’ve mastered in other areas of your life.

    Why Are Most Men Blindsided By Their Failing Marriage?

    By our 40s, the sheer amount of effort we’ve poured into our business or career starts to show.

    The early days of marriage when pennies were pinched have faded and basic life expenses are no longer a stress.

    We hoped that years of hard work and sacrifice would pay off, allowing us to enjoy a fulfilling life with our wife for the long term

    But now that we stand at the best point in life to begin this epic chapter, why doesn’t she doesn’t seem interested or engaged?

    All too common, our years of labor have taken a toll on the marriage and a distance has grown with her.

    It can feel like she has a separate life, one filled with routines and friends we know nothing about.

    The story below tells how a man named David found himself in this exact situation and what he did to turn it around.

    David’s Success At Work Didn’t Equal Success At Home

    David stood in his office, staring out the window.

    His mind was usually absorbed in work.

    Today, however, it was consumed with thoughts of Chelsie, his wife of 18 years.

    At work, everything was clear.

    He set high standards, monitored performance, and got results.

    But at home, his system was failing.

    Chelsie’s cold shoulder had started months ago.

    At first, David ignored it, thinking it would pass.

    But she stayed distant.

    She avoided his touch, brushed off his attempts to connect, and barely talked about her day.

    Frustrated, David had told her many times, “This is unacceptable! I need love and affection in this marriage! What is your problem?”

    Each time, it only made things worse.

    “I shouldn’t have to tell you what’s wrong or what I need,” Chelsie snapped one evening.

    Her words stuck with him.

    Why couldn’t she just tell him what was wrong so they could fix their failing marriage?

    He managed dozens of people at work, each with their own needs, and got them to perform.

    Why couldn’t Chelsie do the same?

    David sighed and turned away from the window.

    Deep down, he knew the answer.

    Chelsie wasn’t one of his employees.

    She was his wife, his source of love—the one person he knew could shake his confidence.

    Women Struggle To Feel Affection For A Man Who Fears Her

    At work, David felt in control.

    He could fire underperformers or change strategies without hesitation.

    But at home, Chelsie’s rejection cut deep.

    Her coldness made him feel small, like he wasn’t enough.

    That fear paralyzed him.

    David had spent months focusing on what he didn’t like in their marriage.

    He pointed out her flaws and told her she was wrong for shutting him out.

    But he never thought about what she needed.

    His critical thinking—his strength at work—was failing him at home.

    The truth was, Chelsie didn’t want a manager.

    She wanted a lover.

    She wanted the playful, relaxed man she had married.

    The David who made her laugh, wasn’t afraid of her moods, and didn’t treat their relationship like a quarterly project.

    That version of David had been buried under his drive for success.

    He was so focused on work that he lost touch with the fun, loving side of himself.

    Deep down, there were many things Chelsie wanted to share with David but she knew her true feelings would be met by his frustration or need to fix them.

    David feared her feelings and he feared losing intimacy – a power Chelise didn’t want to have over him.

    Like darkness slowly enveloping her, Chelsie’s affectionate feelings for David diminished as he continued to hold her responsible for his frustration.

    2 Hidden Mistakes Successful Men Make At Home

    Whenever I’ve coached highly successful men, I’ve noticed two common mistakes.

    The first mistake is we think our wife’s cold reactions are unfair to what we’ve provided.

    We look at our list of amazing things we’ve done, analyze her current reaction, and then think, “This doesn’t add up!!”

    If we can leave our calculator brain at the office for a moment, we can start to see how our wife’s reactions are EXACTLY what they are supposed to be.

    Imagine how different you would respond if you really believed that her feelings were exactly what she was supposed to feel and she was reacting to them the best she could.

    The 2nd mistake I see highly successful men make is we think our money, house, wife, and frequency of sex are confirmation of our success in life.

    I fell into this category hard in my marriage.

    The moment my cash flow, household, or love life changed, I was a frazzled wreck.

    I expected my wife to “mommy” my frustration so I could feel strong enough to take on the world.

    If we want an intimate, sexual relationship with a woman, we cannot make her our mommy.

    When a man INTERNERALIZES his sense of confidence and well-being, he won’t react to his wife as David did, which drove love and affection right out of his relationship.

    How Did David Save His Failing Marriage?

    That evening, David sat in the living room.

    For the first time in months, he ignored his work emails.

    He thought about Chelsie’s words: “I shouldn’t have to tell you what’s wrong or what I need.”

    They hurt, but they also challenged him.

    Could he see past his frustration and fear?

    Could he show her, not tell her, that he cared?

    David knew it wouldn’t be easy.

    He’d have to face his fear of rejection and let go of control.

    But if he approached her with empathy instead of criticism, maybe he could break through.

    Maybe he could melt the icy wall between them.

    He closed his eyes and pictured Chelsie’s smile.

    He remembered the way her eyes lit up when he walked into the room.

    That’s what he wanted to see again.

    For the first time in months, he decided to stop pointing out what she did wrong.

    Instead, he would SHOW her what he wanted their love to be.

    His first step was to not react, but listen when she made small bids for conversation.

    Within a few weeks, they were back to laughing and enjoying each other’s company!

    How did David turn around his failing marriage?

    Ask him and he’ll say –“I internalized my self-confidence & stopped fearing the woman I love”.

    How To Become The Confidant Man Your Wife Needs

    Over the last Three weeks, four of my 1:1 clients have told me, “Holy cow, my marriage has done a full 180!”

    These are highly successful men who have learned how to not settle for the status quo while also not being a controlling jerk.

    In my masculine confidence framework, I teach you how to be a man with a solid spine and a soft heart.

    Book a free Get Grounded Now call and we’ll have an amazing 60 minute chat so I can better understand your situation and give you clear steps to take.

    Stay grounded brother,

    Garrett Prettyman

  • How To Have Certainty When Her Commitment Is Unclear

    How To Have Certainty When Her Commitment Is Unclear

    Our wife’s love and affection is empowering, but when her commitment is unclear it can feel like the rug got pulled out. This article will help you take control when your marriage is slipping away by helping you see that nothing done out of fear can create LONG-TERM closeness in a relationship.

    The Airplane Of Uncertianty


    Imagine you’re on an airplane.

    30 minutes into the flight, the intercom comes on.  

    “Hello, this is your captain speaking. The weather is stormy today! We don’t know our current location or how much fuel we have. On behalf of AAA Airlines, we would like to thank you for choosing us to reach your final destination.”

    Very few passengers would remain relaxed with this sort of announcement.

    If a glance out the aircraft window revealed smoke from the left engine, fear could turn into panic.

    When our wife’s commitment to the marriage becomes uncertain, we can become paralyzed with fear….And panic!

    Fear is a deceptive thing.

    Reactions from fear FEEL logical in the moment, but fear-based responses RARELY help a critical situation.

    “Plane Crash Adverted By Passenger Panic”…Said no newspaper title ever!

    Here’s the twist.

    You’re not a passenger on the “airplane of uncertianty”, you are the captain.

    As captain, you can land the plane even if your wife has pulled the eject button.

    Many guys I’ve coached found after he “landed the plane”, his wife’s parachute dropped her back into his love life.

    “Landing the plane” means no longer:

    • Demanding her love and loyalty
    • Thinking the “other guy” is a threat to getting what you want
    • Trying to convince her why you are the better choice
    • Wallowing in your agony
    • Chasing her for affection and time
    • Forcing her to be decisive and know what she wants

    The list above is what I call “guy drama”.

    “Guy drama” comes from our inner little boy, not the mature man.

    Little boys fall on the ground at the grocery store and cry for candy when their mommy won’t give it to them.

    Little boys also wine, complain, and let their FEELINGS guide their actions.

    Trust me, your wife craves a MAN, not a boy.

    What To Do When Her Commitment Is Unclear

    In the 25-minute video below, I cover 3 areas that will give you more clarity about how to show up as the MAN when your wife is uncertain of her love for you.

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    You can also check out my eBook, “The Sexless Husband’s Guide To Intimacy Through Attraction” to better understand what’s really happening when love and attraction are low in a marriage.

    I would love for you to have MORE love, MORE attraction, and MORE intimacy in your life!

    The season when those things are low can feel brutal.

    You have the potential to be confident, secure, and happy RIGHT NOW.

    If you’ve read this far, then YOU are the kind of man who has the fortitude to make positive changes.

    Your ability to remain unperturbed in your positive, loving, happy, and fun self when your wife’s commitment is unclear is the only path to evoking her desire to join you in being those things. 

    If you want to have a private consultation to see if my coaching is right for you, simply fill out my “Get Grounded Now Form“. 

    Stay Grounded Brother,

    Garrett Prettyman

  • Can You Make Your Wife Love You Again?

    Can You Make Your Wife Love You Again?

    This email explains how we can easily get caught up on surface-level issues in our marriage. Asking if you can make your wife love you again is a surface-level question. We can DO all the right things but that won’t attract our wife’s loving affection if we’re not BEING the kind of man who makes her feel emotionally safe and trusting. Below are three better questions to ask ourselves. These questions will help uncover underlying issues when our wife seems to have lost interest in us.

    1. What Do Women Need To Feel In Love? 

    A few days ago, Google directed a man to my blog because he had a heartfelt question.

    His question was, “Can you make your wife love you again?”

    If you’ve ever wondered if your wife can love you again, you know how he must feel.  

    No doubt his story is much like yours or mine.

    He remembers when his wife used to respond affectionately to his touch and smile when he entered the room.

    Having an intimate and supportive relationship with her probably inspired him to work hard at his job and remain committed to the relationship.

    But over the years, something changed.

    A small peck on her cheek seems to annoy her now.

    Placing his hand on her leg makes her tense up.

    He’s met with excuses when he tries to initiate sex with her.

    He hoped this was just a phase but over the months, it has only got worse.

    Today, he’s wondering if she will ever love him enough to engage in the intimate, respectful, nurturing relationship he craves to have with her.

    Asking if our wife can fall back in love with us is a surface-level question.

    A deeper question is, “What do women need to feel in love?”

    You see, we can DO all the right things in our relationship but if we make her feel disconnected, pressured, or criticized we can kiss intimacy goodbye.

    Without a consistent experience of emotional safety and connection, she won’t feel enough trust to expose her intimate side.

    2. What Limits You From Building Connection, Trust, & Emotional Safety With Your Wife?

    It’s ironic how we, as guys, tend to answer this question the same. 

    We tend to focus on what needs to change about HER (like her state of limbo, irrational thinking, or emotional drama). 

    Another usual response is getting stuck on deciding if the relationship is worth our effort or not.

    These common responses send a message to her that we can’t see past our own discomfort to connect with her feelings.  

    This makes us feel boyish and like a powerless victim to her.

    It should go without saying that being a victim or acting boyish isn’t the path to building a better connection with our wife. 

    Criticizing her moods, arguing, walking on eggshells, and being resentful doesn’t help either. 

    When we look closer at ourselves, we might find even deeper issues.

    When we look closer at ourselves, we might find even deeper issues.

    Issues such as…

    • Feeling like a failure
    • Aversion to conflict
    • A knee-jerk response to people-please

    These deeper personal issues are what we need to focus on to unblock a meaningful emotional connection with our wife. 

    This connection is critical in a long-term relationship.

    Without it, she won’t be able to trust herself to be soft and affectionate towards us.   

    3. What Is 100% In Your Control Right Now?

    There are 3 zones in life… 

    1. What’s out of our control
    2. What’s under our influence
    3. What’s in our control

    Happiness, confidence, clear boundaries, and mojo only come from staying focused on things 100% in our control.

    Our wife’s feelings towards us are under our influence, not under our control.

    Whenever I speak to a man who is frustrated, lonely, upset, rejected, or in panic mode, it’s because he’s been focusing on things that are either out of his control or only under his influence.

    When I’m coaching a man who doesn’t know what to do next in his relationship (limbo) it’s usually because he hasn’t forged an internal masculine frame that is 100% in his control.

    Our masculine frame is our blueprint to follow!

    Although this sounds like simple advice, many of us didn’t know HOW to build a masculine frame that is 100% in our control before our marriage called for it.

    A Call To Confidence

    If we have a blueprint or a “compass” to follow, we will always know how to respond to things like being rejected for sex, marriage limbo, or the uncertainty of her feelings towards us.

    Hint: Her timing or clarity of feelings is not a compass.

    Last year, a man we’ll call John, joined one of my group courses where I teach my masculine confidence framework.

    John was down in the dumps.

    He and his wife hadn’t had sex in many months.

    His wife was unsure if she could continue in their marriage of 25+ years.

    6 weeks into the course, everything changed for John!

    He learned how to have his own compass to follow even when his wife was withdrawn or emotional.

    He learned how to give her emotional space without walking on eggshells around her.

    Her passion for him returned and to this day, they are both loving a brand new version of their marriage!

    When I take you through my masculine confidence framework, I train you to forge an internal locus of control. 

    This means you learn how to respond from the inside out instead of the outside in. 

    Being this kind of non-reactive man who can be comfortable in his own skin is the only version of yourself your wife can fall back in love with.

    Would you like help identifying the underlining issues that are keeping your marriage stuck?

    If so, then fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form for a free consultation.

    Much Love Brother,

    Garrett Prettyman

  • Why Small Dick Syndrome is Ruining Your Marriage

    Why Small Dick Syndrome is Ruining Your Marriage

    Small dick syndrome is the immature version of masculinity. This article provides 53 traits of a mature masculine man. The video below uses some movie scenes to provide examples. Being more masculine isn’t something we have to force. Masculinity is naturally forged in men when we choose the high road when faced with pain and when we resolve the false core beliefs we have about ourselves. 

    YouTube player
    53 Traits Of A Masculine Man

    A while back, a man reached out to me after watching one of my videos. He thought it was pathetic that I teach men how to be masculine but don’t include things in my videos like cars, golf or sports. There’s something this man hasn’t learned yet. Although many masculine men do things like sports, fishing, or golf, doing those things won’t make you masculine. Women have a unique gift called a 6th sense. This means she can smell “small dick” syndrome a mile away even if we’re wearing a Packers jersey in a lifted 4×4 blasting through a mud hole. 

    What Small Dick Syndrome Looks Like

    Our cock can be the size of a baseball bat and we still can have “small dick” energy. 

    We’re exuding “small dick” energy where we’re…

    • Easily triggered, then act on that trigger
    • Always need to “be right”
    • Hold other people accountable for our happiness
    • Raise our voice and try to defend ourselves when questioned
    • Always have an excuse for why we’re innocent
    • Blame other people for our misery/lack of success
    • Have to put others in their place to feel a sense of status or power
    • Take other people’s actions as a personal threat
    • Get jealous or take it personal when our wife finds other guys attractive (or men find her attractive)
    • Resort to physical force to “make” people respect us
    • Seek revenge and go tit for tat when others “do us wrong”

    Small dick syndrome is hard to spot in ourselves because it FEELS like the opposite.

    • We FEEL like we’re being assertive when we’re really being reactive
    • We FEEL like we’re being confident when we’re really being stubborn
    • We FEEL like we’re standing up for our wife when we’re really acting on jealousy or insecurity about our desirability

    Needless to say, acting on feelings won’t create a strong masculine vibe. 

    What A Mature Masculine Man Looks Like

    A mature masculine man dances to the beat of his own drum and isn’t bothered by what others say or do. He has a big grin on his face, and has bigger fish to fry than to be caught up with trivial moods or comments his wife might make. The list below is not something you need to learn. You were born with these masculine traits already hardwired to emerge as an adult. What happens is we can develop insecurities, mental narratives, and deeply held core beliefs during times of suffering that PREVENT us from choosing the high road and being the masculine man we’re naturally good at.

    The 53 Traits Of A Masculine Man: 

    1. Clear
    2. Calm
    3. Direct
    4. Non-reactive
    5. Capable of danger, but controls it
    6. Steady
    7. Responds, but on his own time
    8. Plays the long game
    9. Is self-reliant
    10. Can’t be emotionally swayed by others
    11. Powerful
    12. Stable
    13. Discerning
    14. Confident
    15. Visionary
    16. Wise
    17. Purposeful
    18. Driven
    19. Physical
    20. Courageous
    21. Honorable
    22. Decisive
    23. Protective
    24. Assertive
    25. Focused
    26. Consistent
    27. Embraces Death
    28. Knowledgeable
    29. World-Wise
    30. Mysterious
    31. Intellectual
    32. Truth Seeking
    33. Mystic
    34. Insightful
    35. Detached from others’ reactions
    36. Engineering
    37. Sees probable outcomes
    38. Vivid life force
    39. Sensitive to the outside environment
    40. Embodies pleasure without shame
    41. Sensual
    42. Compassionate
    43. Empathetic
    44. Creates connection
    45. Reads people
    46. Feel’s other’s pain
    47. Sees potential
    48. Lives from the heart
    49. Is present
    50. Trusts intention over outcome
    51. Creates, invents, and innovates what he wants
    52. Is on a mission
    53. Isn’t urgent

    Why Small Dick Syndrome Ruins Marriages

    Every romantic relationship (regardless of gender) requires one person who is in the masculine spectrum and one who is in the feminine spectrum. Our wife is incapable of feeling soft, affectionate, nurturing, receptive, submissive, or sexually turned on when we step out of our masculine energy.

    How You Can Resolve “Small Dick” Energy

    My YouTube critic was correct. Fast cars and golf won’t be on our agenda as we develop your masculinity. When I teach you my masculine confidence framework, I help you cut the blue wire to your triggers and insecurities. I ask you questions so you can see the core beliefs that make you a slave to your emotions. I help you create a frame you would be willing to take a bullet for. Book a call using my “Get Grounded Now” form if you want to talk to me directly. I promise the call will improve your entire week. 

    Be grounded brother, 

    Garrett Prettyman

  • How To Face Marriage Distress With Confidence

    How To Face Marriage Distress With Confidence

    Feminine women are drawn to confidence like a cat to catnip. This week, one of the men in our Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course saw a change in his marriage. His wife, (who had been disagreeable and cold) warmed up! Her change was in response to his new calm/understanding masculine frame. This article provides two key ingredients to be a husband who can face marriage distress with confidence.  

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    Be A Confident Husband: 2 Key Ingredients

    Love Being A Man

    One thing I’m passionate about is empowering men to take life by the horns and create their dreams.

    Yet, many men quickly lose any sense of confidence when it comes to tension and conflict with their wives.

    One major reason for this is due to BRAIN differences!

    A study at the Brain Science Centre in Minneapolis revealed that female brains can process data 5 times faster than a man’s brain.

    This may be why many men tell us their wives can talk circles around them in an argument and always seem to be 5 steps ahead!

    That’s cool, though.

    Good for her.

    She’s got a gift you don’t have.

    Don’t fight against it.

    Appreciate it…and realize that YOUR brain has a gift of it’s own.

    Your brain likes to process data more slowly…at an even pace in a way that makes logical sense to you.

    The data your brain processes needs to pass through various phases of contemplation in your mind before making conclusions.

    It’s a gift and a strength, brother!

    And it’s THAT gift that might make her feel like you’re not listening to her or just staring at her like a deer in the headlights.

    This is nothing for you to be ashamed of.

    Instead, be AMUSED!

    The path to confidence is about being comfortable with who we are authentically and not trying to live by other people’s standards or abilities.

    There are two key ingredients to face marriage distress with confidence:

    1. Be a confident husband by knowing you’re OK
    2. Be a confident husband by trusting your intentions

    Face Marriage Distress With Confidence Knowing You’re OK

    If our wife is talking circles around us in a discussion, she’s doing what people with her brain are supposed to be doing. 

    She’s OK. 

    We’re OK. 

    Everyone is OK.

    If our logical brain tells us she’s way off base or that she isn’t seeing things clearly, take a breath…Our brain is just doing what it’s supposed to do, everything is still ok. 

    A man who knows deep down that he’s OK can face chaos with confidence. 

    The Vikings were unstoppable in battle because they believed they couldn’t die except on the day the gods had chosen. 

    In other words, they believed they would be OK no matter what. 

    The Vikings had what we call spiritual confidence, and it made them a fearless force to reckon with! 

    Face Marriage Distress With Confidence By Trusting Your Intentions

    How other people decide to interpret us is their choice. 

    Honestly, others can never with 100% certainty know what our intentions are, only we can. 

    When we trust our intentions, we can let go of needing to be right, better, or understood by others. 

    For me personally, If I’m not breaking new ground in areas of location independence, time, or financial freedom, I feel like I’m half-assing life. 

    These are the hills I’m willing to die on. 

    I know that I’m disserving the universe of my most potent version of myself if I don’t pursue these routes because they are what energizes me.

    What do you need to create, face, or apply yourself towards to be an energized, inspired, powerful man? 

    Your intentions are honorable when they align with your standards for creating what energizes you. 

    We can relax in our intentions to be a confident man. 

    How You Can Take A BIG Step Towards Confidence This Week

    Right now, men from all over the globe are learning how to have a masculine frame and how to have standards they value in our Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course. 

    Trusting our intentions requires a first step: Knowing our values. 

    When you join the course, Mark & I will teach you how to narrow your values down to a few key components of your energizing masculine frame.

    Your masculine frame will enable you to face marriage distress with confidence by being clear, strong, and sure of yourself.

    If you want something more exclusive than the confidence course, consider personalized 1:1 mentorship.

    Learning my masculine confidence framework in a private setting is the most powerful way to make dramatic changes in your sense of well-being and mojo.

    Book a “Get Grounded Now” consultation to have a meaningful, raw conversation that will get you clear on your next steps.

    Much love brother,

    Garrett Prettyman

  • STOP Tiptoeing Around Your Wife

    STOP Tiptoeing Around Your Wife

    This article is about a man who couldn’t handle his wife’s moods or emotions. Tiptoeing around your wife creates a long-term “drama loop”. A grounded, confident husband nips the “drama loop” in the bud. 

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    Why You Need To STOP Tiptoeing Around Your Wife

    The Negative Effects Of Being Indirect

    Gerald felt torn. 

    He and his wife Susan were sitting in the hot tub. 

    She was looking intently at him for an answer. 

    He didn’t know what to say. 

    Part of him knew if he spoke plainly, all hell would break loose from Susan. 

    The other part of him knew his tactics of tiptoeing around questions had been getting under her skin lately.

    There was a part of Susan Gerald dreaded.

    He had named this part of her “the dragon”.

    Although he had never admitted this term to Susan, she instinctively knew he saw part of her this way. 

    Susan’s “dragon” was a cold, dismissive, angry, moody personality that usually surfaced around her period. 

    For years, Gerald had managed to keep Susan’s “dragon” asleep by not disturbing the peace when she was on edge. 

    He had become a black-belt master of adjusting his responses based on how he felt she would take them. 

    Susan wasn’t the only one who Gerald used this tactic with. 

    Customers, family members, in-laws… Gerald could smooth over anything with anyone. 

    The “Drama Loop”

    Over the last few months, indirect behavior from Gerald made Susan feel very unsupported in the marriage. 

    Her complaints were:

    • I don’t feel supported
    • You don’t stand up for people
    • I can’t trust you
    • I don’t feel heard
    • You don’t understand me

    As Gerald and Susan sat in the hot tub, Gerald opened his mouth to speak. 

    Susan immediately sensed he was going to “walk on eggshells”.

    She stopped him mid-sentence. 

    Susan: “See! You always do this!!”

    Gerald tried to backpedal with a logical excuse. 

    Susan: “Just tell me, did you or did you not tell your mom exactly why we won’t be going to their place for Thanksgiving?”

    Gerald knew he hadn’t been direct with his mom… He didn’t want to piss her off. Gerald had given his mom a list of excuses why they wouldn’t be there for the holiday…

    He tried to explain himself then Susan cut him off again:

    “I’m done. I’m done with you never having any backbone… I don’t even feel like I can stay in this relationship”

    A man who is not in his masculine power rides the drama loop of women in his life. There’s a highly effective process to stopping the drama loop. I teach this process to men every day. I teach you how to stay in your own “lane” when drama strikes. You’re cool, safe, loving, but FIRM.

     Without this masculine “containment” women feel they don’t have a champion in their corner and you feel like you’re walking on eggshells. 

    How To Stop Tiptoeing Around Your Wife

    I gained confidence to be direct by having another man I respect ask me some hard questions. My clarity of those questions gave me clarity to address conflict. You need confidence to stop tiptoeing around your wife. You need men of integrity to ask you some hard questions to challenge your thinking. 

    Fill out an application for my “Get Grounded Now” FREE consultation. I will ask you some challenging questions. Masculinity grows through challenge.

    Much Love Brother,

    Garrett Prettyman

  • How I Got My Happiness Back After My Wife’s Affair

    How I Got My Happiness Back After My Wife’s Affair

    Below is a video from a recent conversation I had with master coach Sven Masterson. I highly recommend Sven’s community and mentorship. Click his name to see the content he has about men, marriage, sex, and relationships. This article will outline exactly how I got my happiness back after my wife’s affair. I promise you’ll find value in listening to my discussion with Sven as well. 

    My Wife’s Affair:

    My August Saturday started off as usual.

    Stacks of book work needed my attention.

    Being self-employed required me to do the job description of 5 employees.

    It had been this way for years

    My wife and I were ghosts in passing.

    This summer was different though.

    The few times we were home together, she acted like I didn’t exist.

    She hadn’t wanted sex in weeks.

    Most weekends she would go out with friends and not come home for days. 

    On this Saturday, my wife was home.

    I was being mopey.

    I dropped a few comments about how nice it would be if she would stay home more.

    Since we both had the day off, I hoped we could at least spend the morning together.

    I sat down at my desk to do the bookwork.

    What happened next changed my entire life.  

    She sat down on the couch beside me and said “I have feelings for someone else“.

    I died that day. My heart was ripped out. I cried for days. I stopped eating. I couldn’t get out of bed. My will to live was gone. My wife’s affair tore me apart.  

    Fast Forward To Now:

    •  I’ve created a life I love!
    •  Live location independent
    •  Spend part of the season deep in the mountains
    •  Ceder trees, creeks, fireplaces, and coffee are all normal parts of my day
    •  I create connection anytime I want it
    •  Have several homes in different states
    •  Have the deep love, sex, intimacy, and relationships I want
    •  No longer dependent on women to feel good or “get lucky”
    •  No longer addicted to porn
    •  Experience the things I love everyday

    Watch this video to hear about 10 key attributes I had to develop as a man to create a life that attracts what I love after my wife’s affair:

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    How I Got My Happiness Back After My Wife’s Affair

    How I Created Happiness In Spite Of My Wife’s Affair 

    Step 1: STOP old behaviors

    Step 2: Grieve the loss (go through all 5 stages)

    Step 3: Develop new mindsets

    Step 4: Develop new behaviors

    Step 5. Develop new ways of communicating

    Step 6. Look forward, then invite

    STOP…

    In my Ebook The Devastated Man’s Marriage 1st Aid Revival Pack I list 26.5 things to immediately STOP doing when your wife cheats or has an affair. Continuing these behaviors pretty much guarantees your life will be miserable. These behaviors also increase the odds of divorce.

    STOP things like:

    •  Checking her phone.
    •  Tracking her location.
    •  Begging, bargaining, pleading.
    •  Trying to win her back with flowers and love notes.

      Chasing = Loosing


    Develop New Mindsets…

    •  Your FEAR of divorce (not divorce itself) will PREVENT a new, better relationship from growing. Understand divorce papers don’t keep you apart any better than the marriage certificate kept you together. 
    •  Realize she didn’t cheat because you’re a bad husband. She cheated because she’s unhappy with who she’s allowed herself to become in the relationship. Even if you’re the worst husband in the world, cheating was her choice.
    •  See her as doing the best she can with the brain she has. In her mind, everything she’s done is justifiable based on how she perceives things. You can’t expect more than that from anyone. 
    •  Understand your pain comes from your perceptions, not her actions. 
    •  Get crystal clear about your values and boundaries. Write down the consequences for those boundaries. Your boundaries are NOT meant to control her. They should NOT be created out of fear, anxiety or insecurity. They are intended to define the borders of what YOU want to experience and what YOU will continue to give YOUR energy to. 
    •  Let her feel the sting of her choices.

    Develop New Ways Of Communicating…

    •  Use statements, not questions with her.
    •  Listen for emotion words when she talks. Connect with those emotion words. 
    •  Don’t defend, explain, justify, or get defensive about your intentions.
    •  Do more listening than talking…Drop the mic. 
    •  Talk your frustrations out with your man support group, not her family or friends.

    Look Forward, Then Invite…

    •  Get laser-focused on your life mission beyond your wife and family.
    •  Face your uncomfortable edges where you’ve been playing small.
    •  Know exactly what your amazing future smells, tastes, feels and sounds like. 
    •  Say “hell yes” to what aligns to your amazing future and “hell no” to what doesn’t.

    TRUST IS THE CORE ISSUE TO ADDRESS WHEN SHE CHEATS OR HAS AN AFFAIR

    •  First, trust in yourself has to be developed before engaging her. Trust in your intentions. Trust in your ability to create a happy day. Trust you can manage your own emotions. Trust in your ability to detach from her moods.
    •  Second, She must show trustablity through consistency.  
    •  Third, she has to show true remorse for her affair.
    • Fourth, YOU must extend trust to her.

    Frame How She Can Gain Your Trust

    Trust is a mutual experience between one person being trustable and the other extending trust. Masculine energy establishes “frames” so she knows exactly how to gain your trust.

    1. “Frame” what you need from her to regain trust.

    2. “Frame” How long you need her to do this

    3. “Frame” the course of action you will take to manage your own insecurities, fears, and anxiety.

    Once I got clear on my boundaries and values, I lovingly removed myself from my wife’s life. I went from being willing to chop my arm off to save my marriage to boldly standing on my operating principles to ensure my happiness.

    If I had found a mentor before my wife’s affair, would my marriage have turned out differently?

    There is no way to know.  

    What I can tell you is everything I’ve created since then is because I had a man by my side coaching me along the way.

    This is what I offer men.

    I can show you exactly how to use the tools you need to create the relationships you want. 

    Some things only “click” when another man gives it to you straight. 

    Get Your Happiness Back Today

    Rather than waiting for my wife to change so I could have an amazing life, I created an amazing life not dependent on her. My new life has attracted what I want!

    Are you ready to have a man in your corner to show you the ropes? Fill out my Contact Form and lets have a talk. It’s free. No strings, no snake oil. See how coaching can make you into the man you want to be.

  • 2 Ways You’re Unknowingly Turning Her Off

    2 Ways You’re Unknowingly Turning Her Off

    When we’re getting under our wife’s skin and unknowingly turning her off, we can be totally oblivious. In this article, I explain the two most common ways you could be turning your wife off without realizing it. I’ll also define the kind of man you need to be to turn her on.

    Has your wife said these words to you?

    “You don’t have my back”… “Stop trying to fix me”… “You don’t “get it”

    I know a husband who had been working long days at his job for years.

    He found a sense of honor in all the sacrifices he made for his family to have a good life.

    Not being able to pay the bills was a stress he never wanted his wife to face.

    • He worked tirelessly to save for a larger home, a dependable car, and even their own hot tub
    • He dedicated himself to resolving every issue that arose along the way, ensuring she could relax and reap the rewards
    • Despite the strain, he reassured himself that his hard work wouldn’t always be necessary

    One afternoon, he came home from work and his wife was crying. “I’m just so lonely”, she sobbed.

    He was pissed. This didn’t make sense.

    He was giving her a dream life!

    She could do whatever she wanted whenever she wanted.

    Deep down, the husband felt jealous she had so much freedom.

    The husband felt incredibly disrespected and undervalued by her response to all he had sacrificed for her.

    He decided to challenge her with a mental “map” so she could clearly see why he wasn’t to blame for how she was feeling. (FYI, the man in this story was me) 

    The 1st Way You Could Be Turning Your Wife Off Without Realizing it: Presenting Her With The “Map”

    I talk more about this “Map” in the video:

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    2 Ways You’re Turning Your Wife Off Without Realizing It

    To summarize the video, when you try to set her feelings straight or justify your actions, you’re presenting her with a “map” and unknowingly turning her off. You’ve shifted the conversation away from “what” to “why“. This will make your wife feel “unheard”. Trying to get her to follow your logical “map” makes her feel like you don’t “get” her.

    It’s like handing a boiling lobster the owner’s manual to the stove it’s being cooked on. 

    You have a man’s brain. You SEE how everything fits together in the bigger picture. For you, spotting problems coming down the road is natural. Your excitement comes from putting those pieces together while keeping your eye on the desired result. You love “maps”.

    Your wife has a woman’s brain. She FEELS what you’re like to be around. She FEELS how you think about her. Her excitement comes from whatever she’s feeling.  Showing her the “map” to justify your actions feels like you’re trying to invalidate how she’s feeling RIGHT NOW. 

    A man doesn’t feel the need to whip out the “map” when he:

    •  Trusts his intentions
    •  Has clarity
    •  Acts Deliberate
    •  Stays Calm
    •  Feels confident in his inherent value as a man 

    She can feel your insecure need to get yourself off the hot seat by presenting the “map”.

    THAT is the turn-off for her. She wants you to “pass her test” by not getting defensive. She wants to FEEL you noticing her emotions, not the reasons for her emotions. 

    The 2nd Way You Could Be Turning Your Wife Off Without Realizing it: Not Valuing What’s Yours To Value

    Sometimes your wife will do things you never would do.

    Sometimes she doesn’t value things you value.

    Your own worth, value, and attractiveness as a man are things YOU need to be grounded in, not her.

    She can FEEL if the removal of her affirmations will crumble you.

    She can FEEL if all she has to do is roll her eyes and you’ll go weak in the knees.

    Women are hardwired to move towards safety and away from danger.

    She cannot feel safe or have deep trust with you when you’re dependent on her for your sense of well-being.

    When a husband is bothered or annoyed by his wife she’s usually doing something he wouldn’t.  

    Maybe she:

    •  Won’t stop talking at dinner with friends
    •  Doesn’t help with housework 
    •  Is always on her phone 

    If you’re bothered by it, SHE’S MIRRORING TO YOU WHAT YOU SUPPRESS IN YOURSELF 

    Example: Let’s say every day she sleeps in and you have to get up early. When you see her sleeping in, you’re projecting how you would feel about yourself if you did that.

    Resentment grows when you see her “get away with it”.

    Jealousy grows when you see her “living how she wants”.

    Part of you would also feel “lazy” if you slept in every day so you label her as “lazy”.

    All these labels are just your own perspectives and triggers! The swirling, changing, flowing feminine energy of our wives pushes us to our edge so we can work on our own shit. She stretches us to consider new perspectives and not get so stuck in a rut.

    Maybe we need to give ourselves permission to enjoy some things in life a bit more

    Maybe we should allow ourselves to have some freedoms instead of getting resentful of hers? 

    How A Happy Attractive Husband Brings The Spark Back

    Your charging cable needs to be unplugged from your wife. One shadow many men have is they think they need to “man up”, “have balls” or “be more alpha”. Although it’s true women find self-reliant men attractive, your batteries will go dead if you don’t plug your charger into a new receptacle. You need a community of men who have your back. You need male comrades. We love maps! We can hash data all day and find it very connecting. Unplug your charger from her and plug it into us or you’ll keep turning her off by draining her.   

    Many husbands are clueless about how to create an emotional connection. For some, it stems from deeper shame or fear of loneliness that motivates him instead of his heart (also a common way men turn off their wife). You can turn that around right now by connecting with me. 

    I teach nice, good, quality men how to:

    •  Be unshakably grounded in your manhood
    •  Have crystal clear boundaries
    •  Live from your values
    •  Create the relationship you want by having effective operating principles and standards

     These are foundational to becoming the strong man you want to be! (without becoming a jerk). Why is it so effective? Because this is man-to-man mentorship. We look forward, not backward.  I’ve been where you’re at and I can show you how to move forward. If you’re serious about stepping into your manhood, fill out my “Get Grounded Now” consultation form. It’s free. No fine print. No stress. I’m a certified life coach living in the mountains of Idaho who likes his eggs over easy and his coffee extra hot. We’re both real men. Let’s have a deep conversation about your current situation. Many men are blown away after this call. We talk about things our dad never told us. I give you tools to start using right away. I guarantee you’ll instantly feel better after we talk.