Tag: walkaway wife

  • Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags It’s Coming

    Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags It’s Coming

    You didn’t marry a walkaway wife: 3 red flags about YOU can push her right out the door, though.

    Even if she’s a Christian…

    Even if you’ve always had good intentions….

    There are 3 red flags in men that women walk away from.

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    Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags It’s Coming

    Red Flag #1: You Fail Her “Jealousy Tests”

    Here’s the thing with a walkaway wife: 3 red flags have arisen from the many men I’ve worked with.

    When a woman leaves a marriage, it’s rarely from a specific argument or forgotten birthday.

    She has been suffering for years, while doing a very good job of hiding it.

    A large part of her desire for you revolves around how secure you are.

    She doesn’t consciously come up with ways to test your jealousy.

    Like I said, this is mostly a hidden thing she feels.

    What happens is her feminine way of making connections everywhere she goes reveals how secure you are.

    Think of all the connections she makes with people as a “jealousy test”.

    Below are some examples of how a man can fail these tests.  

    • Getting controlling or suspicious when she has male friends
    • Stressing out when she gets a text from a guy
    • Anxiously pestering her about why, what, who, or where she was
    • Losing your cool when guys give her attention

    Even if all her male friends want to get into her pants, it’s not a red flag.

    Women are very good at keeping guys in the friend zone.

    Just look at how many husbands are stuck in her friend zone, going for years without sex.

    If you’re wife has to adjust her life because of your insecurities, your relationship is on borrowed time.

    Take a hard look in the mirror and ask yourself why you give a rat’s tail who your wife is friendly towards.

    This was my excuse back in the day: “It’s not that I don’t trust her, it’s that I don’t trust other guys!”

    Another excuse I’ve heard is, “She’s disrespecting me with other guys!”

    Both excuses are based on something most women detest: insecurity.

    I have to laugh at myself for trying to justify those excuses while my marriage was sexless. 

    Seriously. 

    I tried 99.6 “hacks” to get my wife to be intimate with no success.. and I was STILL insecure that with someone else, she would give in…

    Trust me, a woman’s affection is impossible to gain when SHE doesn’t want it to be accessed.

    When our wife feels like we can’t handle how she lives her life, she stops sharing it with us.

    Not long after, she stops letting us inside her heart and body.

    Can we really blame her for closing off when every time she lets us see into her world, we have a cow, act disrespected, or mope around?

    Red Flag #2: You Keep A Mental Score Card Of What She Owes You

    This red flag sounds like this: “After all I’ve sacrificed for this family, the least you could do is give me some sex!”

    Keeping a mental scorecard is deeply revealing about our intentions and indicates a long-term chronic behavior of self-abandonment. 

    I was the guy who “sacrificed” my weekends, time with friends, living location, and hobbies for my wife. 

    On a deeper level, I stopped standing by my own beliefs, stopped prioritizing my own needs, and held her approval on a pedestal.

    Everything I did carried a hidden expectation.

    I would never say it, but boy, could she smell it all over me.

    It got so bad, I couldn’t even hang a picture in the living room or spray the weeds on the sidewalk without expecting her to reciprocate love (preferably in the form of sex). 

    Transactional love will send your wife running for the hills. 

    Red Flag #3: You Can’t Appreciate The “Messiness” Of Your Wife.

    Women are born with a unique ability to create, embellish, stretch, and change the status quo.

    She’s like an artist painting her masterpiece.

    An artist’s room is covered in paint, scraps of canvas, and pieces of craft supplies.

    Yet from the contemplative and messy room of an artist, a high-value painting emerges. 

    A very feminine woman won’t stick to a schedule, finish what she starts, maintain a consistent mood, or make up her mind. 

    If we can’t look at our wife’s “messiness” with the same appreciation as a kitten tumbling in a box of yarn, she’ll grow more masculine, ridged, and closed off around us. 

    We didn’t marry a dude, so we need to stop expecting her to be one.

    She was designed to bring new things into this life.

    Just look at birth.

    There’s blood, poop, slime, screaming… It’s pure chaos.

    But from that mess emerges a new life, your child.

    She is built to “birth” many new experiences into your life.

    Because she is feminine, it will always be messy.

    She is literally the embodiment of Mother Nature.

    Rainbows, sunsets, hurricanes, and wildfires.   

    Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags To Resolve Before It’s Too Late

    The 3 red flags you just read about all stem from one common factor: an insecure husband.

    I spent years trying to “trim the wings” of my wife to prevent her from engaging with other men. 

    I managed to get her lifestyle so boxed in, I thought there was no way another man could get with her…Then she had an emotional affair with a woman!

    Like a lightning bolt to my brain, I suddenly realized isolating your partner from other humans because you’re insecure has never worked and never will. 

    I transitioned from being someone who would act extremely distressed if my partner hugged another man to genuinely celebrating with her when she receives attention.

    This new, secure way of living has produced fidelity in my relationship in ways I NEVER experienced before! 

    You can’t white-knuckle what you want into your marriage, you have to attract it. 

    We’re only making the grass greener on the other side of the fence when we’re puking insecurity all over our side.

    The moment we make something forbidden or taboo, it’s instantly more exciting and tempting to flirt with it. 

    To this day, I’m shocked when I see how being secure with my partner’s engagement around others has disempowered their charm over her. 

    The old me never would have believed it, but letting go is how you get some things. 

    Your Next Step To Attract The Marriage You Want

    Through my coaching, we’ll unpack all the things that scare you.

    We’ll face them head-on with NEW perspectives and NEW understanding.

    This rewires your brain.

    You’ll never stop feeling scared or insecure; you’re human.

    But my process builds a new relationship with those feelings so they no longer control your reactions.

    You don’t need to fear a walkaway wife: 3 red flags can be nipped right now.

  • Walkaway Wife: Why You Need To STOP Chasing Her

    Walkaway Wife: Why You Need To STOP Chasing Her

    If you’ve been trying to get your walkaway wife back, I have news for you. The test results are in (and it’s stamped with a big “F”). Seventy percent of divorces are initiated by women. You know what that means? It means 70% of men were unable to stop the divorce. But you? You’re going to do the opposite of those 70%. Welcome to the 5% club, where marriages are saved. Not because you tricked your wife into staying, but because you used the laws of attraction and stopped chasing her.

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    Walkaway Wife: Why You Need To STOP Chasing Her

    Men Everywhere Are Being Blindsided By Divorce

    Most men never dreamed the girl they married would turn into a walkaway wife.

    Disbelief. Horror. Panic. 

    Those juices surge through his veins like acid when he hears, “I’m going to leave you”.

    Why is she leaving?

    Why didn’t she bring this up sooner?

    Can’t we go to marriage counseling and fix this?

    A walkaway wife is as emotionally damaging as a gunshot wound.

    But running around like a headless chicken never helps… And that’s EXACTLY what most men do.

    They pull out all the stops.

    They flood her with everything she loved while dating.

    He cries, begs, pleads, argues, withdraws, and then writes the most passionate love letter of his life.

    Do all those things, and you’ll join the 70% of men who never got their walkaway wife back.

    You need to understand why she’s pulling away.

    Then, how you should respond makes more sense.

    Why Your Bride Has Turned Into A Walkaway Wife

    24 months ago. 

    That’s how long ago she gave up and started imagining life without you. 

    Giving up felt like relief.

    Like a huge weight lifted off her shoulders.

    She opened herself up to get her needs met outside the marriage.

    Not sexually, emotionally.  

    Work, friends, activities, weekend getaways, counseling… those became her new sources of emotional intimacy. 

    You, on the other hand, were oblivious while focused on surviving the daily grind. 

    >>>Fast forward to now. 

    She has already grieved the loss of the marriage.

    An emotional bond has formed with others besides you.

    She’s already cried until there were no more tears, and it was probably two summers ago.

    That’s why she seems so cold and indifferent now.

    Leaving you? That’s old news to her.

    You feel like an ex-boyfriend or old business partner.   

    You, however, are NOWHERE near the same point as her.

    This is fresh and raw.

    You have a right to feel how you feel!

    Any man would feel the same.

    But acting on those feelings makes your walkaway wife want to rip the band-aid off.

    Why You Need To STOP Chasing Her

    I’ve worked with hundreds of men whose wives had one foot out the door.

    I’ve never seen a walkaway wife return because he smothered her with his unbound love.

    She’s not leaving because you don’t love her, so stop trying to prove it!

    She’s leaving because she no longer feels attracted to you.

    That’s what she means when she says, “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.”

    It doesn’t matter if you still feel attracted to her.

    In this critical moment of marriage collapse, nearly all primal instincts of the male brain push her away (if acted on). 

    You see, all her reasons for wanting to leave you are tied to a common female experience. 

    An experience that has less to do with you than she’ll adimit. 

    Michele Weiner-Davis explains it perfectly in her article “The Walkaway Wife Syndrom”

    Right now, your wife genuinely thinks she has tried everything in her power to help you “wake up” and give her the deep emotional connection and sense of belonging she craves. 

    She did this by following her immature female instincts of arguing, complaining, giving obligation sex, and taking on more responsibilities than she could handle.

    She thought being this way was an obvious cry for help.

    But those behaviours don’t create a deep emotional connection with a man.

    Any wonder she burned out?

    It’s why she’s “done”.

    If you try to chase her, it only makes her run away faster.

    The Attractiveness Of Letting Go

    Have you ever tried to catch a dog by chasing it? 

    I have. 

    Good luck! 

    When you BACK AWAY, the dog gets very curious about what you’re up to. 

    Run away from a dog, and it will be hot on your heels.

    I know what you’re thinking.

    “My wife is complaining that I haven’t been there for her. I need to close the gap, not back away!”

    Man-to-man lesson 101: Never take a woman’s words as a factual repair manual. She is saying what she feels like, not what you should do about it.

    Over the years, your wife has conceived a version of you in her head.

    This version has hardened like concrete. 

    Only one thing melts that version of you from her brain: time. 

    In time, experiencing a new version of you will give her new feelings about you.

    You need to give time and space for the old version to fade from her memory.

    But if you try to become someone she wants, you’ll lose your attractive edge.

    It’s time to go balls-to-the-wall and be the man you’ve always wanted to be.

    Your #1 goal right now is to stop chasing her and start making bold, scary movements towards creating an amazing life YOU love.

    Women act on their own internal pressure

    Just hearing your voice and seeing your face right now is external pressure.

    That’s why space helps a walkaway wife forget what she grew to dislike about you.

    ONLY NON-REACTIVE, PRESENT, SAFE ENERGY COMING FROM YOU CAN INFLUENCE HER INTERNAL PRESSURE IN A POSITIVE WAY. 

    Stop doing anything that feels like external pressure to her.

    Hanging around her, inviting her to events, trying to guilt her into spending Christmas with you and the kids – that is all external pressure.

    It shows you care when you step aside from blocking what she thinks she needs.

    And what she needs right now is to have you fling the door wide open for her to walk out.

    Only a man who is very secure in himself can do this.

    The irony is that traits like security and confidence can only be built in the total absence of feminine support. 

    That’s what I teach men to develop when faced with a walkaway wife.

    Your value and sense of well-being must no longer be attached to your wife’s validation. 

    Have A Walkaway Wife? Do This Now

    Nothing is more effective in creating lasting change than man-to-man mentorship. 

    I challenge your thinking.

    I give you new mindsets.

    An open, deeper, authentic, confident version of yourself emerges.

    You’ll stop chasing your walkaway wife and start being a man women walk towards.

    Are you ready?