Every week, men in failing marriages reach out to me. During the first 15 minutes of our consultation, I already know if his wife will be able to stay in the relationship. No, I don’t have a crystal ball. Here’s the thing with a walkaway wife: 3 red flags have arisen from my own experience and the many men I’ve worked with. Watch the video below or keep reading to spot the early signs.
Surprise!
I don’t need to know anything about your wife to spot if she won’t be able to stay in the relationship.
When a woman leaves a marriage, it’s rarely premeditated.
Rather, it’s a quiet growing apart from issues going years back that the husband is typically oblivious about.
The first red flag is when we’re jealous about our wife’s relationships with other men
I’m talking about jealousy that’s been going on for years.
Below are some examples.
- Getting controlling or suspicious when she has male friends
- Stressing out when she gets a text from a guy
- Anxiously pestering her about why, what, who, or where she was
- Losing our cool when guys give her attention
In the list above, it’s not her interacting with other men indicating marriage trouble, It’s our insecurity puking all over the floor that’s bad news.
A wife who has to adjust her life around our insecurities won’t be able to do so for the long haul.
Take a hard look in the mirror and ask yourself why you give a rat’s tail who your wife is friendly towards.
This was my excuse back in the day, “It’s not that I don’t trust her, it’s that I don’t trust other guys!”
Another excuse I’ve heard is, “She’s disrespecting me with other guys!”
Both excuses are based on something most women detest: insecurity.
I have to laugh at myself for trying to justify those excuses while my marriage was sexless.
Seriously.
I tried 103.6 “hacks” to get my wife to be intimate with no success.. and I STILL was insecure that with someone else, she might give in if pursued. ?
Trust me, a woman’s affection is impossible to gain when SHE doesn’t want it to be accessed.
When our wife feels like we can’t handle how she lives her life, she stops sharing it with us.
Not long after, she stops letting us inside her heart and body.
Can we really blame her for closing off when every time she lets us see into her world we have a cow, act disrespected, or mope around?
The 2nd warning sign is when we’re telling our wife, “How could you (fill in the blank) after all I’ve done??”
This red flag is deeply revealing about our intentions and indicates a long-term chronic behavior of self-abandonment.
I was the guy who “sacrificed” my weekends, time with friends, living location, and hobbies for my wife.
On a deeper level, I stopped standing by my own beliefs, stopped prioritizing my own needs, and held her approval on a pedestal.
It got so bad I couldn’t even hang a picture in the living room or spray the weeds on the sidewalk without expecting her to reciprocate love (preferably in the form of sex).
Transactional love will send our wife running for the hills.
The 3rd red flag is if we can’t appreciate the “messiness” of our wife.
Women are born with a unique ability to create, embellish, stretch, and change the status quo.
She’s like an artist painting her masterpiece.
An artist’s room is usually covered in paint, scraps of canvas, and pieces of craft supplies.
Yet from the contemplative and messy room of an artist, a high-value painting emerges.
A very feminine woman won’t stick to a schedule, finish what she starts, maintain a consistent mood, or make up her mind.
If we can’t look at our wife’s “messiness” with the same appreciation as a kitten tumbling in a box of yarn, she’ll grow more masculine, ridged, and closed off around us.
We didn’t marry a dude, so we need to stop expecting her to be one.
Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags To Resolve
The 3 red flags you just read about all stem from one common factor: an insecure husband.
I spent years trying to “trim the wings” of my wife to prevent her from engaging with other men.
I managed to get her lifestyle so boxed in, I thought there was no way another man could get with her…Then she had an emotional affair with a woman!
Like a lightning bolt to my brain, I suddenly realized isolating our partner from other humans because we’re insecure has never worked and never will.
I transitioned from being someone who would act extremely distressed if my partner hugged another man to genuinely celebrating with her when she receives attention.
This new, secure way of living has produced fidelity in my relationship in ways I NEVER experienced before!
We can’t white-knuckle what we want into our marriage, we have to attract it.
We’re only making the grass greener on the other side of the fence when we’re puking insecurity all over our side.
The moment we make something forbidden or taboo it’s instantly more exciting and tempting to flirt with it.
To this day, I’m shocked when I see how being secure with my partner’s engagement around others has disempowered their charm on her.
The old me never would have believed it, but letting go is how you get to have some things.
Your Next Step To Attract The Marriage You Want
In The Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course, we teach a framework to have unshakable self-confidence.
We teach you new mindsets about insecurity, feelings, fears, and transactional behaviors so you can be the kind of man who gets to have the faithful, openhearted, intimate relationship you want.
Even if you’ve already experienced a walkaway wife, this course offers your best opportunity to either re-attract her or establish a new, improved, and secure relationship with another woman.
Would you like to have personal guidance in a private setting to learn this stuff?
Fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form for a free, 60-minute, deep conversation where I’ll get you clear on what you need to do next.
Be grounded brother,
Garrett Prettyman
Work Cite
Michele Weiner-Davis, “The Walkaway Wife Syndrome“, March 30th, 2008.
Steve Horsmon, “4 Late-Stage Walkaway Wife Syndrome Behaviors“, Oct 10th, 2020
Schedule your free Masculine Confidence Call and get tailored guidance using the Masculine Confidence Framework™.
Or, check out my free eBook on how to restore passionate intimacy.
Stay grounded, brother.
Garrett Prettyman
Founder of the Masculine Confidence Framework™
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