Secret# 2 Pressure: The Silent And Deadly Marriage-Killer. This is the second in my series of 6 dangerously effective marriage-saving secrets. I help extraordinary men create long-lasting love, deeper connection, intimacy, respect, and authentic affection through personalized masculine confidence coaching. These secrets are field-tested. They’ll bring lasting positive change in your relationships.
Click HERE To Read Secret# 1.
I know firsthand how frustrating it feels when you genuinely don’t know what to do next.
There were many points in my marriage when I didn’t know what was happening.
My wife would spiral out, and I couldn’t make any sense of it.
I was oblivious to how I had been adding pressure: the silent and deadly marriage-killer, to the relationship.Â
I explain more in this video:
Why Pressure Ruins Marriages
Pressure is the opposite of attraction.
Here’s some common marriage-killing forms of pressure.
- Disapproval of her emotions
- Withholding praise as “punishment”
- Responses not to understand her, but to gather data to fix the problem
- Need for her to not be “out of sorts”
- Attempting to make her feel like it was all her fault
To women, these hidden agendas feel like external pressure to conform.
If your wife recently announced she wants divorce then there’s a whole new level of pressure to remove:
- Let go of needing specific outcomes
- Don’t resist the divorce process
- Stop spending time with her
- Speak calmly and follow through on what you say
Force anything (animal or human) to do something and you’ll get the same result: Resistance.
External pressure = Bad (women run from this).
Internal pressure = Good (Women make positive changes from this).
When a woman feels her own internal pressure, she makes positive changes because she wants to.
3 Things You Can Do Right Now To Build GOOD Pressure In Your Wife
- Take leadership for something around the house. What have you been offloading to your wife that is actually your responsibility? Balancing the checkbook? Walking the dog? Leading your own happiness? Whatever this thing is for you, take responsibility for it and see it through to completion.
- When your wife talks tonight, just listen. Attention affects women the same way sex affects men. Pushing for sex will push it away. Sex is a byproduct of intimacy. Listening is the first step to facilitating intimacy.
- Go for something you want! Want to sit with, connect, or enjoy your wife? Does she complain that all you want is sex? Unapologetically let your wife know you would like to enjoy being with her but put a limit on it. “I would like to sit with you for 5 minutes honey, then I’m going to go play guitar”. Putting a limit on the time takes the pressure away. Doing something you love after REALLY takes the pressure away.
Your Next Steps To Removing Pressure: The Silent And Deadly Marriage Killer
There’s an effective process I take men through.
You:
- Unplug from your wife’s moods and plug into solid men
- Get an upgraded mental-map
- See new perspectives to address faulty core beliefs.
- Become a happy, confident, emotionally-online man
- Get solid in your values and hold to your integrity
- know what you want and how to create it (very important)
You become the kind of man who can lead a woman through her emotions with ease.
These are the results of being in my “Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course”.
Doing something for your wife, expecting to gain something from her is pressure to conform.
Can you move your expectations off her and onto yourself?
A man who leads his own happiness can lead his family.
This is the kind of man who releases pressure, (the silent and deadly marriage-killer).
Be secure brother,
Garrett Prettyman
Schedule your free Masculine Confidence Call and get tailored guidance using the Masculine Confidence Framework™.
Or, check out my free eBook on how to restore passionate intimacy.
Stay grounded, brother.
Garrett Prettyman
Founder of the Masculine Confidence Framework™
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