Are you pointing a finger at your wife for your sexless marriage? Don’t blame her until you take a hard look in the mirror, brother. When your wife emotionally and sexually withdraws, you can find yourself in the depths of despair and heartache. I know a sexless marriage wasn’t what you signed up for. But wallowing in resentment and blame doesn’t create intimacy. Let Chris’s story below be your roadmap back to confidence and intimacy.
How Did Chris End Up In A Sexless Marriage?
Meet Chris.
Chris is known for his remarkable kindness and for always going the extra mile to please others.
He has a gentle soul, and conflict is his sworn enemy.
He would do anything to avoid confrontation and prides himself on being a peacemaker.
Chris’s marriage to his wife, Sarah, started off blissfully.
They were deeply in love and seemed to have a fairytale relationship.
As time passed, Sarah began to feel a growing disconnect.
Chris’s unwavering niceness became suffocating, and his fear of conflict prevented open communication between them.
Rather than leading an emotional connection with Sarah, Chris would walk on eggshells, hoping not to upset her.
In their intimate life, Chris’s insatiable sexual neediness further strained their relationship.
He constantly sought validation and reassurance, often pressuring Sarah for physical intimacy.
His desperation for connection had unintentionally pushed Sarah away, and she no longer felt the same attraction she once had.
Sarah longed for a partner who could stand up for himself, express his desires and needs, and engage in honest conversations.
She craved a sense of balance, where both partners were able to communicate their feelings openly, even if it meant occasional disagreements.
Feeling the growing distance, Sarah contemplated the state of their marriage.
She realized that if things continued as they were, both of them would suffer.
Sarah knew deep down that Chris’s innate kindness was genuine, but it was overshadowed by his fear of conflict and his inability to assert himself.
She wanted to feel attracted to Chris, but an unexplainable pressure kept her from feeling anything but disgust whenever she was around him.
Though she hated to think of it, Sarah knew deep down that the only way she could have the relationship she wanted was to leave Chris.
Does Avoiding Conflict Lead To A Sexless Marriage? Don’t Blame Her If She’s Turned Off By It
Chris’s wife wasn’t trying to punish him by withholding intimacy.
Even she felt confused why her body shut down around him.
Jump forward 24 months.
Chris and Sarah’s marriage only worsened.
Sarah had come to terms that she didn’t want to be with Chris and told him she wanted a divorce.
Chris was devastated.
Determined to change, he embarked on a journey of self-improvement.
Chris sought mentorship to explore his own insecurities and learn healthier ways of expressing his needs
Through self-reflection and guidance, he began to strike a balance between being kind and standing up for himself.
He discovered that true strength lies not in avoiding conflicts but in being unshakable in his self-esteem, boundaries, and personal values.
Over time, the dynamic between Chris and Sarah started to shift!
Chris was living from a more masculine frame, and it evoked something primal in Sarah.
Their conversations became more honest and open as they learned to communicate their desires and concerns without reacting from a place of neediness, insecurity, or fear.
Chris’s newfound self-assuredness and willingness to engage in constructive dialogue reignited the spark in their relationship.
As they grew together, Chris learned the importance of maintaining a healthy balance between kindness and assertiveness.
He discovered that intimacy blossoms when his vibe feels safe and grounded.
Sarah felt comfortable sharing her feelings with him again.
In a word, it was Chris’s newfound confidence with emotions that drew her in.
Your Chance To Restore Intimacy
Did the story of Chris & Sarah sound familiar?
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Over the years, I’ve appreciated the research into intimacy Esther Perel has done.
In her article, “Are Taboos Holding Your Relationship Back?” she reminds us how familiarity breeds loss of desire.
Let this truth relax your anxious mind that when something NEW comes out of you, something NEW will come out of the relationship.
Have A Sexless Marriage? Don’t Blame Her… Focus On Being A Man You’re Proud Of
Your love story can take a new turn.
Your relationship can be stronger and more passionate than ever when you stop trying to please her and focus on rebuilding your self-confidence.
You can learn how to give her space without losing her.
You can use a season of no intimacy to dig deeper into being a more self-reliant man.
Why?
Because feminine can’t help but be attracted to a self-reliant, confident man!
And hey, you know that feels good:)
In my coaching, I can give you highly personalized guidance to rebuild your attractive masculine energy.
