Working with men worldwide to create the loving, affectionate, soul-glowing relationship they want gives me a unique point of view. I get to see what’s working out there and what’s not. Learning how to give your wife space without losing her isn’t a matter of following a checklist. The issue to address lies within your ability to live as a self-reliant man.
Why Your Wife Wants Space
Don’t worry about why.
Seriously.
If she’s already asking for space, the season to ask “why†has long passed.
I know many men who pushed for the “why†at this inopportune point.
Those men drove their wife right out of their life.
Needing to know “why†is a primal drive in men, so I get why you feel the urge.
We think if we can sort out WHY then we will know how to fix it.
Women always sense our motives.
“Fix itâ€â€¦She can smell that motive a mile away.
Your sexy wife has a girl brain so I can assure you, “fix it†does not make her panties wet.
Trying to pinpoint all the “whys†with her is like puking on the floor and then shoving her face in it to identify what bad food you ate…while she’s sick with covid.
This is NOT how you attract loving desire from a woman.
How To Give Your Wife Space Without Losing Her
If you don’t give her the space she’s asking for, she’ll FEEL like you don’t love her, care about her desires, or understand her feelings (even if you do).
You have to look at “space†backward.
It’s not about how much line to let out before you lose the fish.
It’s about knowing what to “reel in†(more on this further down) so fish feel comfortable swimming next to you.
The way to give your wife space without losing her is to live as a happily divorced man.
Many online influencers talk about their, “5-step plan to get her back†or the, “no contact rule†to get her back.
These tactics provide quick positive results…IF you’ve only been dating or married for less than 24 months.
Long-term relationships are a whole different breed.
Your wife of many years won’t be fooled.
There’s a good chance you’ve grown apart over the years and “no contact†would be more of the same.
If you haven’t already, read my eBook, “The Sexless Husband’s Guide To Intimacy Through Attraction”. This eBook gives a basic outline of the 5 “seasons†your marriage will go through.
The biggest mistake I see men make when faced with “space†is they start acting on impulse, fear, and desperation instead of clarity, calmness, and self-reliance for their happiness.
Sure, there are PLENTY of reasons to get angry, resentful, distrustful, and anxious when we see the woman we love back away.
Taking the high road is a choice.
We have to TRUST taking the high road IS THE ONLY WAY TO CREATE WHAT WE WANT.
4 Things NOT To Do When She Says, “I Need Spaceâ€
- Don’t get her flowers, declare your undying love, or try to get her turned on for sex
- Don’t follow her around or phone her “just to check inâ€
- Don’t track her, plan things for her to show up to, confide in your inlaws, or try to sway her friends (especially the inlaws part)
- Don’t have long conversations about the relationship, beg, convince, present your case for why this can be fixed, or try to buy her back with a new house or truck (I know guys who did this!!).
4 Things TO Do When She Says, “I Need Spaceâ€
- Do pour all your focus into improving yourself as a virl, purpose-filled, confident man who’s living a life he loves.
- Do grow what makes you a high-value man by your own standards.
- Do use this opportunity to launch, create, or dive into something not practical to execute when tied to the time constraints of a relationship.
- Do “reel in†your needs, anxiety, loneliness, expectations, attachment to outcomes, and fairy tale stories in your head. (The removal of those things will give her “space†even if you’re in the same room with her).
A man who respects himself and others won’t try to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t want to be with him.
Trying to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t want to be with us is akin to forcing ourselves sexually onto someone who doesn’t want us.
Here are the words of an attractive, confident, man who respects himself:
“I understand you need space and feel uncertain about your feelings for me sweetie. I’ll be glad to give you 4 months of separation. If after that time, if you don’t want to be with me, I’m prepared to let you goâ€
Notice this man would show masculine energy by taking leadership of the situation.
He’s also lifting a tremendous amount of pressure off her by saying HE will be the one to let her go.
Being masculine and removing pressure is attractive to the feminine.
Any interaction you have with your wife during separation (no matter how small) is an opportunity to show her a whole new version of you.
A version that is inspired, fulfilled, happy, calm, and takes leadership.
What If My Wife Has An Affair When I Give Her Space?
Then she will encounter your strong boundaries and clarity about the types of women you commit to.
Focus on being the right man and let the wrong women sluff away.
Clarity About Your Next Step
Without clarity, there can be no confidence.
Worrying and fretting about how to give your wife space without losing her is a path of walking on eggshells.
It’s not attractive.
Guys I coach through my masculine confidence framework dramatically speed up their evolution into being an attractive man of high value.
The reason is simple.
Understanding how to embody masculine traits, lead with confidence, and uphold strong personal standards will significantly transform your relationships with women.
Fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form for a free consultation.
Your next 30 years will thank you.
You got this brother,
Garrett Prettyman
