Masculine Confidence Framework

Category: Attraction

This section contains Empowering blog articles are for men passionate about creating attraction with their cold, dismissive, or withdrawn wife.

My Wife Wants A Divorce But I Don’t!
I tip my hat to you, brother! Saying, “My wife wants a divorce but I don’t” bears testimony of your love and care for the relationship. Trying to keep your family and marriage together is a noble act! This article will help you focus on root issues that must be addressed for your marriage to be saved. I’m including a true story about how one of my clients saved his marriage.

Do Not Do What You Feel Like Doing

Notice how paramedics behave when they show up to the scene of an accident.

They arrive calm, intentional, and focused on their role without adding to the drama.

Almost all the things you feel like saying, feel like doing, and feel should make your wife want to stay in the marriage will only push her away.

The reason for this is simple.

Right now, you are in a state of fear and desperation.

Have you ever met a desperate salesperson?

Did you want to buy from them?

I think you see my point.

To save your marriage, you’ll need to do things that will feel counterintuitive.

The proof is in the pudding, just read the true story below.

Paul looked at me and said, “My Wife Wants A Divorce But I Don’t!”

Paul came to me desperate to save his marriage of 10 years.

Over the last two years, he had tried to be the best husband possible only to learn his wife had been having an emotional affair over that time.

Paul was hurt beyond words and was ready to cut off his right arm if it would save his marriage and keep his family together.

About 20 minutes into our conversation, it became obvious what was wrong with his relationship.

Paul’s wife had become her own man.

We can identify when our wife has become her own man when she…
- Is making most of the decisions
- Is the only one addressing conflict with friends and family
- Has been in charge of the romance department for a long time
- Is being logical, punctual, and direct
- Acts from her thinking instead of her heart
- Notices what needs to be done and goes first
The magic formula for marriage to work is for the man to be masculine and for the woman to be feminine.

Men can choose to be masculine whenever they want.

However, a woman isn’t necessarily able to be feminine whenever she wants.

Like a flower that needs water, soil, and sunlight, a woman’s feminity needs a safe environment to emerge.

Women who become their own man are made, not born.

For many years, Paul had been wishy-washy in his choices.

He avoided conflict and placated to whatever would make his wife happy.

Pleasing her during intimacy was his source of personal validation.

Since he didn’t want to come off as an asshole, he would always agree with her and not set boundaries.

When we live the mantra, “Happy wife, happy life”, we are setting our wife up to feel alone and unprotected.

Her fun, flirty, soft, and affectionate side needs a knight standing at the door for her to feel safe, not a people pleaser.

If the knight becomes reactive and dangerous, she will put up her guard and be her own man.

If the knight hides in the corner afraid of upsetting her, she will put up her guard and become her own man.

How Paul Saved His Marriage

Paul and I worked together for almost nine months.

Over that time, we focused on building his masculine frame so he could have confidence in his relationship.

He learned how to respond from his own agency, and to interact with his wife from a place of empathy and curiosity.

The biggest test to his confidence came when I told him, “If you love her, you need to let her go”

Paul finally stopped resisting the divorce process his wife had been determined to pursue for so long.

He finally accepted that if she couldn’t see a future with him, then she was free to go.

This was not an easy choice and it weighed heavy on him for weeks.

Paul focused on self-care and spent time with quality men he looked up to.

Then one day when he least expected it, his wife called off the divorce.

They made love that night and to this day are still together.

Their marriage is very different now since Paul is leading the relationship with his masculine frame.

His wife is learning to relax into her feminine energy and let go of things as Paul takes the lead.

Mentorship For Men Saying, “My Wife Want’s A Divorce But I Don’t”

If you’re ready to be guided on a path of building your masculine frame, then fill out my “Get Grounded Now” consultation form.

The masculine confidence framework I teach men enables the kind of environment women need to relax into their affectionate, vulnerable, soft, and juicy side.

Our first call is free!

I was once that guy who called a mentor and said, “My wife wants a divorce but I don’t”.

I’m ready to share all the insights I’ve collected over the years to help your marriage!

I promise you’ll gain instant clarity about what to do differently in your relationship.

Much love brother,

Garrett Prettyman
July 16, 2024
How To Make Your Wife Sweet & Affectionate In 7 Days
If you want to know how to make your wife sweet and affectionate then listen up. There are 3 steps to take this week to turbo-boost your relationship. Keep reading or watch the video below to learn some raw truth about what your wife needs to change.

The Raw Truth About Changing Your Wife

Fact check…We can’t change other people.

Especially for us men, this is hard to swallow.

I’m the oldest of 4 brothers.

As a kid, I could make my brothers do whatever I wanted since I was bigger than them.

Our father could make us do whatever he wanted with a dominating voice or fear of punishment.

I developed a subconscious belief that others should bend to a man’s will.

I tried for 10 years to change what I didn’t like about my wife.

Then in 2018, a mentor showed me a different way.

You see, I had it backward.

I can’t make women sweet and affectionate, but I can be the kind of man women are sweet and affectionate with.

There is what women say they want and there is what they can’t help but want.

Activating what she can’t help but want is what I’m going to show you how to do.

If You Can’t Make Your Wife Sweet & Affectionate, Then What Should You Do?

If we get back to the primal roots of what it means to be masculine, 99% of marriage issues clear up on their own.

Attraction is NATURAL and will occur without our intervention if we stay in our masculine frame.

Here are 3 steps to take this week so your wife can experience your attractive masculine frame.
1. Stop applying negativity to things you don’t like
2. Celebrate your wife
3. Go do things you love
Do the above for the next 7 days and notice what changes.

If you like the changes, keep it up!

Being negative towards what we don’t like about our wife has about a 5% success rate.

Yet we men tend to use negativity a lot.

Do you know who else is negative towards what they dislike?

Children.

Like I always say… Women crave men, not boys.

If someone’s behavior has the power to make us negative, they are our boss.

Women are attracted to a man who can’t be bothered, not a man who makes her the boss of how he reacts.

If we take it personally whenever she does something for herself, we are once again acting like a boy, not a man.

In his article, “No, You Can’t Change A Person” Mark Manson points out how trying to change others is manipulation and a violation of personal boundaries.

Having good intentions won’t make up for the violation our wife feels when we try to coerce or change her behaviors.

To Make Your Wife Sweet & Affectionate, She Needs To Be Celebrated

To see to her core and praise her for who she is your wife’s deepest need.

When we celebrate our wife’s “wins” or fun times she has with her friends we are showing that we are happy for her and glad she had fun.

I used to keep a mental scorecard of how much attention she gave me vs others and would make a fuss if she had fun without me.

Experience has shown me women feel a draw towards those who celebrate them.

She isn’t out to maliciously hurt us, but it can feel like that if we have a scarcity mindset.

An abundance mindset knows other people having love, attention, money, intimacy, or fun won’t reduce what’s available for us to create.

The Secret To Erotic Intimacy

When we take the initiative to do things we love for our own sake, we lift a huge burden off our wife’s shoulders.

At the core of wild, fun, erotic intimacy is the exchange of energy.

The type of energy doesn’t matter really.

Feeling very upset with each other many times translates into passionate intercourse against the wall.

Or you could be teasing towards each other until you are both so ravenous you’re ripping each other’s clothes off.

But if we’ve been using the marriage bed as a place to GET energy, validation, or affirmation, our wife will feel drained by the mere thought of it.

Get out this week and do something you love.

Let it fill you down to your toes.

Swim in it.

Come home with a spark in your eye and let your wife off the hook for making you happy.

Such behaviors tend to have a happy ending.

I walk men through the steps of my masculine confidence framework so they can be comfortable in their own skin and let attraction do all the work.

You’ll enjoy being the kind of man who can make your wife sweet and affectionate again!

I would love to hear about your personal situation and get to know you.

Fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form so we can talk!

Be grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman
July 10, 2024
3 Steps To Take If Your Marriage Is Failing

Years ago, I was stressing out at 3:00 AM typing “My marriage is failing and I don’t know what to do” into Google. I compare that time of my life to being on a train headed for a concrete wall without knowing how to apply the brakes. This article and video below will give you 3 steps to take when your marriage is failing. In the end, I’ll share a secret every husband should know about.

Men Who Saved Their Marriage Took These 3 Steps

It’s a lonely season when we feel Google is the only person we can turn to when our marriage is suffering.

Many men can relate.

We find ourselves completely alone while facing relationship problems we have no idea how to resolve.

Welcome to a new way brother.

I connect men into a brotherhood where they share sage old wisdom unfiltered.

Here is some of that wisdom…

When A Marriage Is Failing, Take These 3 Steps

Step 1

Don’t do what you feel like doing.

During marriage distress, doing what we feel like almost always makes matters worse and will leave us with regrets.

Do you feel like begging? Don’t.

Do you feel like getting her a dozen roses? Don’t.

Do you feel like setting an ultimatum? Don’t.

How we act when we’re desperate never ignites our wife’s affection.

There is a time to boldly and confidently declare your wants, but at this point of marriage collapse, we have way too much fear and anxiety in our blood for our actions to not wreak of desperation.

Step 2

Come to terms that the marriage cannot be worked on.

We can only work on one thing, and that is ourselves.

This means we need to grow the biggest pair of balls we’ve ever had and let the version of the relationship we’ve been feeding in our heads go.

That means dropping the idea that she’s a total bitch or that she’s your “one and only”.

It’s easy to assume if we stop fighting for the relationship, the marriage will be over, our wife will start having sex with other men, and we’ll end up alone forever.

These are all fear-based assumptions.

What we want in life can never be created from a place of fear.

If our wife smells fear on us, she will feel like she has to fend for herself (a terrifying place for a woman to be).

Things like love, affection, and a deep relationship cannot be white-knuckled into existence.

Trying to “work on the relationship” is the same as trying to fly a kite when there is no wind.

No amount of fixing or tweaking the kite will allow it to soar until there is wind.

Being a man of momentum who is unshakable in himself, has a specific purpose he’s passionate about, and fearlessly creates the experiences he loves in life is the wind your relationship needs.

Step 3

Let her come to you.

In order for her to come to us, we need to first be at a place for her to join.

Want her to be happy? Figure out how to be happy yourself.

Want her to respect you? Learn to show respect towards her.

If we want to be chosen, desired, and sought after, then we must give her choices, not chase her, and make ourselves a rarity to possess.

If we’re full of anger, resentment, expectations and gloom, it’s a low bar for her to join us at.

Invite her to a juicy, interesting, exciting way of doing life by doing it for your own sake.

If she wants to join, she will see your example as an invitation.

A Bonus Secret To Turn Your Relationship Around

Imagine thousands of men worldwide who have already been in your situation.

Think how valuable it would be if they all came together to share what has worked and what hasn’t worked in creating a great marriage.

Over the years, these men would have actively observed which practices failed and subsequently removed them

Mindsets, behaviors, and actions that proved to create lasting positive change would be clarified into basic steps.

My secret is this collective wisdom is what you gain in my private coaching.

I didn’t make this stuff up.

I’m passing on to you the accumulation of knowledge from countless mentors and real men doing life successfully.

Gain years of experience in a short amount of time by reaching out.

Fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form for a free consultation.

I promise the secret wealth of knowledge we’ve been accumulating over the years will prove invaluable to you if your marriage is failing.

Be grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman

April 6, 2024
5 Crucial Stages To Lasting Love In Marriage
I usually show men a few slides when they reach out for a consultation. I want them to understand the 5 crucial stages to lasting love so they don’t waste time trying to fix the wrong things. I decided to put these slides in this article so they can help more men. The following video is a presentation of the slides where I go into more depth.

5 Crucial Stages To Lasting Love In Marriage

Many men feel alone and uncertain about what to do to help their marriage.

The more we get to know other men, we quickly realize we’re all in the same boat, experiencing similar relationship dynamics.

I want to give full credit to Dr. Jed Diamond for introducing me to the 5 crucial stages to lasting love.

Based on my marriage and the many men I’ve helped, I’ve adjusted these stages to what I’ve seen most guys (and myself) experience.

I’ve also added more information about what women specifically experience when they’re questioning if they married the wrong man.

The 5 Crucial Stages To Lasting Love

Here’s what I see as the 5 stages every marriage goes through:
1. New Relationship Stage
2. Monogamous Stage
3. Bonded partner Stage
4. Disillusionment Stage
5. Long-Term Love Stage
It’s important to recognize which stage we’re currently in so we can make the right choices.

Each of these seasons needs something different to add spark and love back into the relationship.

For example, limiting contact with our partner in the new relationship season will make her miss us whereas doing the same in the disillusionment season will make her glad to get a break from us.

This is why we can’t apply relationship advice from random YouTube videos and expect our marriage to improve.

Another example is having a date night, even if it’s just to check a box, usually fosters a closer relationship with our wife during the monogamous season.

But, if we’re planning dates just to check a box during the bonded partner season, the date in itself won’t do much.

This is because by the bonded partner stage, she needs a deeper emotional connection to happen during the date for it to be impactful for her.

How Each Stage Progresses

A new relationship season swamps our brains in dopamine.

A simple touch or eye gaze feels electric and sensual.

However, women feel a lot more fear daily than men do.

When we start getting affectionate with a girl we like, she soon wants to know, “What are we?”.

Most of us guys settle her fear by assuring her we no longer are pursuing other girls, and SHE is our girlfriend.

Making her our girlfriend can calm her relationship anxiety for a few years at most.

Eventually, she brings up her next fear: “Are we going to tie the knot?”

We men tend to keep resolving her fears as they come up.

After the proposal, we’re addressing where we’ll live, if we’ll have kids, if we’ll have chickens, etc.

Once we put a ring on her finger and settle all these fears, most men start coasting through life.

We behave as if we can’t lose her.

Because we’ve been having lots of sex, the release of oxytocin has suppressed the dopamine in our brains, so we feel more like a bonded family than honeymoon lovers.

We have become highly domesticated, abandoning the majority of our hobbies, friendships, and freedoms for her and the family.

We are at our lowest point of attractiveness during this stage.

Many women have a midlife crisis at this point since life feels like it isn’t going anywhere.

Welcome to the disillusionment stage, where both the husband and wife question if they married the wrong person.

Her 5 Stages Of Disillusionment

Here are the 5 stages I see women go through once they enter the disillusionment stage:
1. Self Improvement Stage
2. Checking Out Stage
3. I’m Not In Love With You Stage
4. I Need Space Stage
5. I’m Done Stage
Most of us totally missed the warning signs of the self-improvement stage.

She started doing more work around the house… She tried initiating sex more…Maybe she started going to therapy or the gym.

It’s easy to perceive her self-improvement stage like she’s finally getting her stuff figured out!

What’s really happening is she’s giving the marriage one last shot.

Taking the lead in a relationship like this isn’t natural for her, and as a result, she often experiences burnout.

Once she burns out, she checks out.

This stage is easy to miss since we think the marriage is improving when she stops putting up a stink about us.

What we do normally notice over this time is we’re only getting obligation sex from her.

Women only complain about things they care about.

A healthy, normal marriage will have a woman who gives a lot of hoots about what she doesn’t like in the relationship.

The ship starts to sink fast once she checks out because not long after she’ll say the words, “I love you but I’m not in love with you“.

If the man continues to be the same guy he’s always been in the relationship, divorce is on the horizon.

The path to divorce starts off with her needing space.

During this season, she’ll no longer let us be in the room when she changes her clothes, she’s making plans or traveling without us more, and spending most weekends away from the house.

She’ll want to sleep separately and eventually will want to get her own place.

Once you’ve heard the words, “I’m done” there is only a 4% chance the marriage can be turned around without divorce being involved.

The time frame from the “self-improvement stage” to the “I’m done” stage is usually about 2 years.

I have met men where it took 10 years, but that isn’t the norm.

I also know several guys who were very confused by how passionate the sex was after she said, “I love you but I’m not in love with you”.

What’s happening is she’s trying to find release for the intense emotions boiling in her.

This is why we can’t use sex as a gauge for marriage repair.

What most of us experience over this time is “the ice queen”.

Her closed-off, icey moods are like a zombie version of who we knew our wife to be in years past.

How You Can Take Charge Of The 5 Stages To Lasting Love

We can’t talk our way out of something we behaved ourselves into.

If I told you exactly how to act when your wife is being an ice queen, you would win the battle but lose the war.

If I coached you on how to lead your wife out of her head and into her heart, we would only be addressing a symptom, not a root cause.

There is a deeper work to do.

Many coaches are only helping men go from point A to point B.

I do transformational coaching so that you can self-coach, self-source confidence, and be self-assured that you are making the right choice 100% of the time.

I compare it to teaching someone how to shop for food vs how to grow their own food…Which guy do you think will confidently survive an apocalypse?

If you’re ready to step up and lead the 5 crucial stages to lasting love, fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form.

I promise you’ll have a better sense of what to do after we talk.

Be grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman
March 25, 2024
How To Get Your Wife Back With Honesty (3 Myths Busted)

I get it because I’ve been there. You’re willing to do anything to get your wife back. Like any self-reliant man, you’ve searched Google for how to fix your marriage! This article will debunk 3 online myths about “getting your ex back” with brutal honesty. Keep reading or watch the following video to gain clarity about what works and what’s all smoke and hot air.

How To Get Your Wife Back With Honesty (3 Myths Busted)

What! The Internet Lied To Us??

Do you remember when searching for something on Google used to pull up forums of real people having real conversations about topics?

That old way of indexing online content is history.

Now, our online searches only reveal what the algorithms think we should see and what marketers have paid for us to see.

Those claiming to have a 90% success rate at saving marriages are just trying to get ad priority, clicks, and money.

I’m willing to be honest with what I’ve seen work and not work for men.

Honesty is one of my values, so I’m going to tell you the truth even if it costs me a sale.

Debunking Myths On How To Get Your Wife Back

Let’s pull out the shotgun and eliminate a few misconceptions running around feral on the internet.

Myth 1: You can save your marriage even if your wife doesn’t want to.

I’ve been engaging with thousands of men in troubled relationships worldwide for several years and this is unheard of.

Yes, we can do self-improvement even if she doesn’t want to.

Sure, we can invite her to join a new standard of interacting in the relationship.

What’s self-evident is until SHE decides she wants the marriage to work, fighting for the marriage fails nearly every time.

I explain this more in my article, Walkaway Wife, Why You Need To STOP Chasing Her.

What we see work is LETTING GO of the marriage and accepting that if she doesn’t want to be married to us, she is free to go.

I’m not advocating that you should file for divorce, but I am saying you shouldn’t be trying to resist it.

Myth 2: Opening up more to your wife will bring you closer together.

This is the kind of advice you’ll hear from women and wiki pages on how to improve relationships.

Digging everything out from under the rug so we can identify our attachment styles and childhood traumas can be equally as unproductive.

In the therapy world, this is called “low-mood therapy” when we try to focus on everything “wrong” with the relationship.

Despite many women claiming this would have closed the gulf between her and her husband in years past, only about 5% of women have done enough personal development to handle a man’s raw vulnerability.

For the rest of us in relationships with the remaining 95% of women, we need to trust that having a support system outside the marriage is what works best.

If you don’t believe me, click HERE to read an excerpt by researcher/author Brene Brown.

Let your wife do more talking so SHE feels connected.

Men open up through affection and intimacy, not by talking about the past.

Our wife, being the opposite, needs to get everything off her chest or she won’t feel affectionate enough to give us the intimacy we need to feel close and bonded with her.

Reacting triggered, defensive, distracted, or trying to fix her when she opens up puts divorce in our cards, brother.

Myth 3: “No contact” makes her want you.

I bring this one up all the time.

Yes, when dating, “absence makes the heart grow fonder“.

In a long-term relationship, absence just makes her glad she doesn’t have to put up with us.

If you want more info on this, read my article, “How To Give Your Wife Space Without Losing Her“, where I discuss what to do instead of “no contact”.

In a nutshell, there are things like neediness, begging, and constantly pestering her for assurance that we can stop dumping on her.

For guys who can’t shut off their insecurities, jealousy, heartbreak, and desperation around her, I do recommend the no-contact rule for HIS sake (not hers).

How To Get Your Wife Back With Tried & True Practices

The masculine confidence framework I teach men isn’t about becoming some badass with a sports car and tattoos.

I help you build a clear framework so you’ll never second guess if you’re responding correctly.

You’ll gain a purpose for your life that goes beyond your wife and kids.

We can’t awaken the version of our wife who wants to feel passionate for us until we have this kind of clarity and life mission.

I don’t guarantee that the new version of your life that’s inspiring, meaningful, self-assured, and purpose-driven will re-attract your ex.

What I guarantee is the right woman will be drawn to it, and sometimes that person is your ex.

Are you ready to stop relying on YouTube duct tape to patch your relationship together?

Then fill out my “Get Grounded Now“ form for a free consultation.

We’ll have a deep and meaningful conversation.

I promise you’ll gain a new perspective about being the kind of man who creates the relationships and experiences you want!

Be grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman

March 17, 2024
Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags It’s Coming
Every week, men in failing marriages reach out to me. During the first 15 minutes of our consultation, I already know if his wife will be able to stay in the relationship. No, I don’t have a crystal ball. Here’s the thing with a walkaway wife: 3 red flags have arisen from my own experience and the many men I’ve worked with. Watch the video below or keep reading to spot the early signs.

Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags It’s Coming

Surprise!

I don’t need to know anything about your wife to spot if she won’t be able to stay in the relationship.

When a woman leaves a marriage, it’s rarely premeditated.

Rather, it’s a quiet growing apart from issues going years back that the husband is typically oblivious about.

The first red flag is when we’re jealous about our wife’s relationships with other men

I’m talking about jealousy that’s been going on for years.

Below are some examples.
- Getting controlling or suspicious when she has male friends
- Stressing out when she gets a text from a guy
- Anxiously pestering her about why, what, who, or where she was
- Losing our cool when guys give her attention
In the list above, it’s not her interacting with other men indicating marriage trouble, It’s our insecurity puking all over the floor that’s bad news.

A wife who has to adjust her life around our insecurities won’t be able to do so for the long haul.

Take a hard look in the mirror and ask yourself why you give a rat’s tail who your wife is friendly towards.

This was my excuse back in the day, “It’s not that I don’t trust her, it’s that I don’t trust other guys!”

Another excuse I’ve heard is, “She’s disrespecting me with other guys!”

Both excuses are based on something most women detest: insecurity.

I have to laugh at myself for trying to justify those excuses while my marriage was sexless.

Seriously.

I tried 103.6 “hacks” to get my wife to be intimate with no success.. and I STILL was insecure that with someone else, she might give in if pursued. ?

Trust me, a woman’s affection is impossible to gain when SHE doesn’t want it to be accessed.

When our wife feels like we can’t handle how she lives her life, she stops sharing it with us.

Not long after, she stops letting us inside her heart and body.

Can we really blame her for closing off when every time she lets us see into her world we have a cow, act disrespected, or mope around?

The 2nd warning sign is when we’re telling our wife, “How could you (fill in the blank) after all I’ve done??”

This red flag is deeply revealing about our intentions and indicates a long-term chronic behavior of self-abandonment.

I was the guy who “sacrificed” my weekends, time with friends, living location, and hobbies for my wife.

On a deeper level, I stopped standing by my own beliefs, stopped prioritizing my own needs, and held her approval on a pedestal.

It got so bad I couldn’t even hang a picture in the living room or spray the weeds on the sidewalk without expecting her to reciprocate love (preferably in the form of sex).

Transactional love will send our wife running for the hills.

The 3rd red flag is if we can’t appreciate the “messiness” of our wife.

Women are born with a unique ability to create, embellish, stretch, and change the status quo.

She’s like an artist painting her masterpiece.

An artist’s room is usually covered in paint, scraps of canvas, and pieces of craft supplies.

Yet from the contemplative and messy room of an artist, a high-value painting emerges.

A very feminine woman won’t stick to a schedule, finish what she starts, maintain a consistent mood, or make up her mind.

If we can’t look at our wife’s “messiness” with the same appreciation as a kitten tumbling in a box of yarn, she’ll grow more masculine, ridged, and closed off around us.

We didn’t marry a dude, so we need to stop expecting her to be one.

Walkaway Wife: 3 Red Flags To Resolve

The 3 red flags you just read about all stem from one common factor: an insecure husband.

I spent years trying to “trim the wings” of my wife to prevent her from engaging with other men.

I managed to get her lifestyle so boxed in, I thought there was no way another man could get with her…Then she had an emotional affair with a woman!

Like a lightning bolt to my brain, I suddenly realized isolating our partner from other humans because we’re insecure has never worked and never will.

I transitioned from being someone who would act extremely distressed if my partner hugged another man to genuinely celebrating with her when she receives attention.

This new, secure way of living has produced fidelity in my relationship in ways I NEVER experienced before!

We can’t white-knuckle what we want into our marriage, we have to attract it.

We’re only making the grass greener on the other side of the fence when we’re puking insecurity all over our side.

The moment we make something forbidden or taboo it’s instantly more exciting and tempting to flirt with it.

To this day, I’m shocked when I see how being secure with my partner’s engagement around others has disempowered their charm on her.

The old me never would have believed it, but letting go is how you get to have some things.

Your Next Step To Attract The Marriage You Want

In The Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course, we teach a framework to have unshakable self-confidence.

We teach you new mindsets about insecurity, feelings, fears, and transactional behaviors so you can be the kind of man who gets to have the faithful, openhearted, intimate relationship you want.

Even if you’ve already experienced a walkaway wife, this course offers your best opportunity to either re-attract her or establish a new, improved, and secure relationship with another woman.

Would you like to have personal guidance in a private setting to learn this stuff?

Fill out my “Get Grounded Now” form for a free, 60-minute, deep conversation where I’ll get you clear on what you need to do next.

Be grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman

Work Cite

Michele Weiner-Davis, “The Walkaway Wife Syndrome“, March 30th, 2008.

Steve Horsmon, “4 Late-Stage Walkaway Wife Syndrome Behaviors“, Oct 10th, 2020
February 29, 2024
How Two Of My Clients Re-Attracted Their Wife This Week
This news is hot off the press. This week, two of my clients found themselves in similar situations they never saw coming. My clients re-attracted their wife who even two weeks ago, wanted out of the relationship. I tell their story below of how their runaway ladies came running back.

How Two Of My Clients Re-Attracted Their Wife This Week

If You Love Her, Let Her Go

There’s a milestone men I work with usually reach.

The husband finally drops his expectations for his wife to make him happy.
- He would like her to love him, but he’s cool if she’s not up for it.
- He wants a sweet and affectionate partner, but he won’t try to change her if she isn’t.
- He would like her to be married to him, but he’s not going to hold the door shut if she wants out.
When a man reaches this stage, his wife tends to second-guess her choice to leave the relationship.

Both of my clients had partners who were emotionally cold and adamant about ending the relationship a few weeks ago.

For months, these guys chased their lover trying to get her to choose him.

Today, they’re being chased by her.

Neither of these guys had been trying to save their relationship recently (and that’s the secret).

When these men first started coaching with me, they were hell-bent on saving their relationship.

During our first few weeks together, we focused 100% on strengthening their masculine operating principles so they could be strong enough to let their partner go out of love and self-respect.

Over and over I’ve seen women circle back when the man demonstrates this much self-security and love by setting her FREE.

Letting go of a woman includes letting go of all the stuff we’ve been holding against her.

These guys also learned to let go of the neediness, fear, desperation, and anxiety that had driven them to hang onto their relationships with a death grip.

The truth we have to reckon with is that true love does not possess, it sets free.

In the story of the fisherman eating fish, “because he loved fish”, we can clearly see how his actions were no doubt NOT seen as “love” for the fish he caught and ate.

We might think because our heartaches that we truly love our wife when in fact it’s just “fish love”.

My Clients Re-Attracted Their Wife Because Leadership Is Attractive

Part of having a strong masculine core is being able to LEAD.

Leading means going first.

Want a happy wife? Show her how to be happy by making choices for your happiness.

What about a respectful wife? Show her how to be respectful by respecting her feelings and opinions.

Maybe you want a wife who chooses you? Let her go so she has choices.

Letting your wife go and then hiding in the bushes waiting for her return doesn’t work.

Both my clients were shocked when their partner wanted back into the relationship because they GENUINELY had let her go, moved on, and were actively creating NEW amazing lives without her.

The masculine confidence framework I teach provides a blueprint to gain massive self-confidence, a clear value system, and an inspiring mission worth living for.

Women are attracted to men who are bold leaders who fearlessly create the life they want!

As my clients discovered, your ex isn’t the only person who notices how attractive you’ve become when you’re secure enough to let her go.

Many times, other women come out of the woodwork when you’re a confident, secure man.

You go from having no women who want you to having several.

Not everyone has the means to commit to 1:1 coaching like these guys did.

That’s why we created the Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course.

In the course, Mark Drezga & I teach the framework you need to regain your mojo and masculine leadership without breaking the bank.

My clients re-attracted their wife, I promise you’ll attract something you didn’t expect when you start living in the new frame the course teaches.

I’m a “Go big or go home” man.

If you share the same mindset, we can make something BIG happen together.

1:1 mentorship is the BIGGEST, most personalized, powerful, and heart-connecting way to learn this stuff.

Book a “Get Grounded Now” consultation if you would like to gain clarity about your next steps to improve your marriage through 1:1 coaching.

Be grounded brother,

Garrett Prettyman
February 12, 2024
How To Make Your Wife Want You Again
This article discusses how women respond to the energy we bring into the relationship. I’ll use examples from the TV show “Vikings” to illustrate how you need to be to make your wife want you again.

Focus On Causes, Not Symptoms

Every day, I speak to men in a desperate spot.

They sincerely want to save their failing marriage, but everything they do seems to backfire.

I know how it feels to become hiper focused on everything that’s “wrong” assuming those issues are the only thing preventing our marriage from turning around.

The problem with this approach is we’re trying to resolve symptoms, not causes.
- Lack of affection/no sex
- Poor communication
- Blaming attachment styles
- Love language frustrations
- Emotional coldness/withdrawal
- Her inability to be respectful or do self-improvement
The list above are symptoms, not root causes.

I say it all the time, “Love covers a multitude of sins”.

When our wife feels attracted to us, she overlooks the annoyances (and so do we).

The level of personal happiness and fulfillment we feel outside of marriage determines how we’ll eventually feel inside the marriage.

The degree to which we can create an amazing life without our wife determines the degree to which we can create one with her.

If we’re not emotionally secure enough to let her go, we’re not emotionally secure enough to have her.

These are the kinds of insecurities and root causes that cripple a relationship.

How You Need To Be To Make Your Wife Want You Again

Watch my video below to see how a woman changes when the man gets his spark back.

How To Make Your Wife Want You Again

One of the most effective ways to attract a woman is to let her go.

She wants to have the freedom to CHOOSE you, and she can’t have that freedom unless she knows she has the freedom to NOT choose you as well.

A man without an inspiring life mission will see his wife as his source of happiness and purpose for living.

He can’t let her go because he can’t imagine living without her.

Woman are not wired to be responsible for their happiness AND ours.

A huge burden is lifted off her shoulders when we have a life that’s so energizing that our spark, charisma, excitement, joy, and inspiration are full regardless of what she does.

How A Viking Reattracted His Lover

In the video, I pointed out how the more Rollo wallowed in his self-pity, victim mindset, and lack of purpose the more Siggy lost her attraction for him.

He blamed his brother, his ex-lover, the gods’, and everyone else for his life.

For a time, Rollo tried to demand respect and love from others and that quickly made his situation worse.

I realize this story is made up, but it mirrors what I see with men I work with.

Again and again, I’ve seen my client’s wife circle back after the man gets clear, excited, and motivated by his positive future to the point that he lovingly lets her go.

These men grew to the point they:
- No longer resisted the divorce process.
- No longer needed to “be right”.
- No longer needed her mood be different for him to be ok.
- Could unshakably trust in their own ability to create the experiences they wanted.
- Accepted that she is on her own journey of personal growth and is progressing at her own pace.
- Stopped “fighting for the marriage”
In the video, Siggy suddenly became re-attracted to Rollo because his spark brought energy to the relationship instead of taking energy from it.

She wanted to feel ALIVE.

Women move towards what makes them feel ALIVE.

We as men get to take the lead and demonstrate what feeling alive looks like.

Our partner is wired to respond to the energy we bring into our relationship.

Our vibe, tone, and look in our eye does all the talking.

Getting Your Spark Back

When I take men through my Masculine Confidence Framework I’m giving them the foundation for WHO they are, then helping them get clear on HOW to be that man in their relationship.

Men emerge from this framework with personalized, unflappable self-trust and inner security.

You read that right.

YOUR masculine frame is not going to consist of the same values or operating principles as the next guy.

My coaching challenges YOUR pain points, YOUR perspectives, and YOUR excuses.

An interesting study revealed how high testosterone doesn’t necessarily equal high female attraction.

What the researchers discovered was low levels of cortisol (the stress hormone) had more of an appealing effect on women than high testosterone did.

We don’t need to be more “macho” for our wife to want us, we need to be more comfortable in our own skin, more OK, and more relaxed to face what needs to be faced.

If you’re ready to have your brain rewired so you can make decisions quickly, know how to be with feminine emotions, and live as a man with an inspiring purpose, then fill out my Get Grounded Now contact form to schedule a free consultation.

I promise you’ll gain clarity on how to make your wife want you again without being fake or manipulative.

In total honesty, we CAN’T make our wife do anything, we can only be a higher standard that makes the choice to join us blindingly obvious.

Much love brother,

Garrett Prettyman
February 10, 2024
She Said, “Is Sex All You Think About?” – How To Respond

Do you hesitate to answer probing questions from your wife or girlfriend? Then listen up! Questions like, “Is Sex All You Think About??” don’t have to be a landmine. Keep reading to learn how to defuse your partner’s booby trap questions.

She Said, “Is Sex All You Think About?” – How To Respond

“Is Sex All You Think About?”

Make no apology for being male!

Reflect on the history of humanity spanning thousands of years.

Since the beginning, women have been attracted towards, bred with, been lovesick for, and chased men being men.

Thanks to men’s insatiable drive for physical intimacy, the human race has not gone extinct yet.

When a woman says to me, “Is sex all you think about?” I smile and say, yup!

Men are supposed to feel opened, softened, ignited, drawn out, and inspired by sex.

Sex is the portal men gain emotional connection and bonding through.

This is how we’re supposed to be wired, there is nothing wrong with it!

Our Opposing Twins

Our personality splits into opposing versions when one part of us is expressed and the other is repressed.

Just as our mind will go unconscious if we endure to much pain, part of our personality goes unconscious if we sense it won’t be accepted.

Let this primal survival instinct play out over time, and symptoms like loneliness, depression, lack of motivation, and feelings of despair build up.

We can nip this process in the bud by doing one thing: Stop letting other people decide what is acceptable or unacceptable about you!

There’s a toxic mindset among a lot of men these days.

The mindset is that men in their natural form are chauvinistic, patriarchal pigs who need to change to be what women say they want us to be.

You’ll often hear me say, “There’s some things we get to know as men that are best to not share with women”.

The irony is the statement above is one of those things that doesn’t serve to share with women, lol.

We men with logical brains can foresee probable outcomes.

When our child wants to eat candy for lunch, they may not understand why we won’t let them.

Explaining, “because something tastes good, doesn’t mean it’s good for you” won’t resolve the child’s FEELINGS for candy.

There will be times when you’ll foresee fulfilling your wife’s wishes will cause a train wreck further down the track.

Since her perspectives are largely backed by feelings, it usually doesn’t serve to try to change her mind by exposing our logic.

Keep the logic to yourself, and simply offer her your curiosity and empathy.

Notice WHO is setting the “bar” for success in your life that you check yourself against.

That’s how to know if we’re suppressing part of our personality, verses staying mum on something that isn’t going to serve if exposed to a woman.

The “bar” is our behavior, value, or boundary WE hold ourselves to so we can enjoy feelings of integrity each time WE hold ourselves to it.

The “bar” is also the rules we know we must play by to create an amazing life that aligns with our deeper purpose and mission.

When we let other people set the bar, we’ll feel a need to alter ourselves, agree with their perspectives, or abandon our own internal compass for their compass.

Being A Man On A Feminine Planet

Women are a hurricane of emotions, ideas, creativity, and life.

Her feminine chaos doesn’t bring much to fruition until she encounters a strong framework.

Masculine is that framework.

Online influencer Teal Swan wrote a great article on masculine containment if you want more information on what that means.

Being a woman’s husband isn’t too far off from being her father.

Some women have chosen to reject this masculine frame and become her own man.

These masculine ladies won’t feel much sexual polarity with men who are strong, secure, clear-thinking, driven, or unapologetic because to be honest, she doesn’t need a man.

Sadly, just as when men become their own woman, it creates a persona riddled with angst, exhaustion, frustration, loneliness, and burnout.

We can’t force our wife to be less masculine, but we can be more masculine ourselves so she doesn’t feel the need to be.

How To Be A Secure Man When She Says, “Is Sex All You Think About?”

We can transform from being a guy who rattles off an 18-point logic list when a woman rolls her eyes to becoming a man of inner confidence and charisma, who wears a slight smirk even on rainy days.

To be a woman’s frame, we must first have our OWN frame.

That’s what I’m teaching men in my 1:1 Masculine Confidence Framework Coaching Package.

If you want to get your thinking cleared up, your insecurities resolved, and your fears addressed, then reach out for a free consultation!

Much Love,

Garrett Prettyman

February 9, 2024
How To Make Your Wife Love You
I bet as a newlywed, the title, “How To Make Your Wife Love You” never would’ve grabbed your attention. A few years, bills, and kids later, it can feel like the #1 issue in our lives. This article gives two mindsets that need to change if you want your wife to love you again.

How To Make Your Wife Love You

Natural Love Vs Forced Love

I’ll spill the beans right now… you can’t make your wife love you.

“But shouldn’t she love me for who I am?”

Nope.

She doesn’t owe you anything.

Nobody does.

“But she vowed to be my wife! She promised!”

Doesn’t matter.

She can’t force herself to love you.

The sooner we stop believing the lies fed to us by society and fairy tales, the happier we’ll be!

Your wife is a female so she will always act on her FEELINGS.

However, we tend to doubt that things are that simple.

Our male brain is convinced troubleshooting the problems will fix the relationship.
- Why won’t you be affectionate?
- Why won’t you have more sex with me?
- Why won’t you respect me?
- Why won’t you be sweet and romantic?
- Why won’t you open up?
Funny how we would NEVER use all those “why” statements on a first date to seduce a woman.

So why do we think hashing these pain points with our wife will be effective?

For me, those “why” statements are how I sound when I’m responding from fear, anxiety, and insecurity.

We need to shift our mindset and realize things like affection, love, sex, and intimacy are things that ensue but cannot be pursued.

Numerous dictators have demanded obedience and loyalty, yet the commitment of their followers is never as fervent as that of the zealots who ATTRACTED their followers.

Females are RESPONDERS to the vibe in the room.

Think of feminine love, affection, and desire like the moon.

Without a light source, there is no moonlight.

You are her light source.

Again, we guys assume what we DO is the light she responds from!

We make money, unclog the toilet, take the family on vacations, mow the lawn, and then expect her to be dripping in desire for us.

The vibe we put out while we’re doing these things is what she responds from, not the action itself!

This doesn’t mean we should stop unclogging the toilet or mowing the lawn.

We DO those things for our OWN sense of integrity.

She will sense when we stop DOING things with a vibe of expectation towards her and start BEING a man who enjoys living up to his own standards he has for himself.

Chasing Love Chases It Away

The most effective way to get rid of a woman is to chase her.

I know what you’re thinking, “I thought women want to be pursued”? This is true.

Women WANT to be pursued.

Give her that pursuit, and she loses the WANT.

Keeping her wanting is the secret to attraction!

You know what comes along with wanting? DESIRE.

Warning! This is one of those things we get to know as a man but should never tell to a woman.

In her emotional brain, it will never make sense to her.

Just ask yourself this, how often has placating to your wife’s perspectives helped your relationship?

Exactly.

Adjusting your responses to her whims gave you a friend-zoned, sexless marriage, didn’t it?

Trying to align to her feminine perspectives has been lowering her attraction to us all along.

Needing Her Support Turns Her Off

Women are wired to show up to the finish line of the race and feel ALIVE celebrating with you in your accomplishments.

Hand-holding, support along the way, and being our emotional tampon during the race is a mothering role no lover is going to sign up for.

When we seek mothering energy from our wife, we can kiss her erotic side goodbye.

Support, a pat on the back, and the encouragement we need as men must come from men.

A lot of us sought mothering energy from our wives through sex!

We used sex to validate ourselves as being successful men.

We saw our ability to give her an orgasm as feminine approval.

The more secure we get about not needing her to validate us, the more her desire for intimacy grows.

We need to shift our mindset from holding others responsible for how we feel to taking responsibility for the vibe we’re putting out.

I’ve known women who broke up with their previous partner because “all he wanted was sex”

Yet, now she’s having tons of sex with her new lover, so what’s different?

What’s different is the new lover doesn’t give a shit when she’s not in the mood.

If he starts to grope her and she pulls his hand away, he doesn’t pester her or mope.

He acts like he couldn’t care less if she isn’t in the mood.

When he sees her on her phone instead of engaging with him, he goes and creates an adventure or experience more interesting than her phone.

He gives her a kiss in the morning with zero expectations that she will reciprocate.

He makes sure to treat himself so he can BRING energy to the relationship instead of trying to GET energy from her.

She understands she doesn’t have to provide anything for him to feel empowered.

A woman’s lover side can’t help but be drawn in when she senses our strength is self-reliant.

Go From Sexually Needy To Secure and Sexually Empowered

There’s a specific process I went through to build my security from the inside out.

Some of my old mindsets needed to be rewired.

Some of my values had to be rewritten!

Building our inner man is like undergoing surgery.

Cutting out our false ideas and challenging our old beliefs is bloody work.

I personally sought mentorship from men who had what I wanted.

In my 1:1 Masculine Confidence Framework, you’ll gain a deep understanding of the enduring principles and perspectives held by these individuals.

If you’re ready to stop blaming your wife for how you feel and start living like a powerful, clear-thinking, masculine man then reach out!

I offer a FREE 60-minute consultation to see if this work is right for you.

If you want to jump right in, consider my Vital Formula To Masculine Confidence Course.

The course contains committed men who are getting their brains rewired and gaining a clear masculine frame!

There’s a shift you’ll notice in doing this work…

You start off wanting to know how to make your wife love you, but eventually, you realize the true challenge lies in living as a secure, mission-focused man who loves himself.

Much love,

Garrett Prettyman
February 9, 2024